Page 28 of Reckless Hearts

They’re talking about it like it’s nothing like someone didn’t just die. Their only concern is that they may jinx themselves.

“I heard he had a kid.”

“His mistake for having a family while riding. Should have known better.”

My nails dig into my palms as I pull my knees up to hide my face. The edges of the world blur and tilt too loud, too close, too fast.

Did they talk like this when my dad died? Sorry about his kid, but he should have known better?

The worst part is…they’re not wrong.

He should have known better.

They risk their lives every weekend, and you don’t do that when you care about someone.

You don’t risk your heart like that.

Because it’s the person left behind who has to deal with it, who loses a piece of who they are.

I count my breaths like my therapist taught me. Five in, three out but it’s shaky, useless.

“Hey, Cal, you should see the scars these two have. Must have made a deal with the devil to still be alive.”

They’re laughing while I’m falling apart.

Blood rushes in my ears, muffling the noise around me as their stories bleed together.

“Remember when Colt got stomped on?” someone says, and the words cut through too fast for me to block.

I shudder.

“You cold?” Colt throws an arm around my shoulders, mistaking my reaction for a chill.

I nod, not trusting my voice.

Maverick tips my chin up, searching my face, and I try my hardest to lock it down. I don’t want them to see what it does to me.

I don’t want them to know I left because I couldn’t watch them anymore.

Whether he figures it out or not, Maverick knows something’s wrong.

He cups my cheek, rubbing his thumb along the edge. “You want to go in?”

I want to run.

I want to get as far away as possible.

Pretend none of this is happening.

Pretend they aren’t risking it all.

It’s tempting to go back to the safety I’ve lived in for years.

I force a smile. There’s plenty of time to hide later.

Right now, I’m not willing to give up a single second with them.

Because what we have,the three of us, it’s rare.

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