Page 15 of In Your Dreams

“Good, keeping it light and casual,” she says.

“Yeah, and sometimes he will say he can’t wait to see me Friday or that he’s excited but it’s in a nice way not a creepy way. It doesn’t come off as too much or too intense.”

“Also good,” she says. “Parker is a good friend but when he’s dated over the years, I haven’t known the women well enough to ask what he’s like to date. So I’m glad to hear he passes the dating vibe check.”

“Has he dated a lot since night school?” I’m not usually one to gossip and it’s none of my business really, but I’m curious. It’s not even from a jealous place. More like I’m not all that experienced having gotten with Wayne so young and it makes me sort of nervous.

“Umm, not too much. He dated this one girl, what was her name?” She says, as if asking herself. “God, that’s bad. His longest relationship was like a year and I can’t remember her fucking name.”

“What happened there?” I ask, taking another bite.

“She moved away for a job, what was that job?” She muses mostly to herself again. “Shit I’m a terrible friend. I can’t remember anything about her. Anyway, she got a job offer somewhere else, and asked him to go with her and he said no. I heard from Wade that he said it didn’t feel like love. He said something like he knew it wasn’t love when his first instinct wasn’t to follow her.”

“I feel him on that, honestly. I probably would’ve thought the same thing.” I nod my head in unison. I’m a firm believer that when you know, you know. It doesn’t matter if you’re fourteen or forty, you can feel it.

“Well, it seems he just hasn’t found the right girl,” she says.

I begin to wonder if I could be the right girl. It’s not that I’m anywhere near thinking I’m ready to settle down again. That would be way too soon. But it’s fun to imagine anynumber of scenarios, some being that Parker and I hit it off and we’re together forever. Then again, more than once this week I have imagined tomorrow going so terribly that we hardly speak to each other after due to multitude of fake embarrassing scenarios. Did I do some overthinking this week? You betcha.

“What are you planning to wear?” She asks, breaking my trainwreck of thought.

“Umm, he said casual so I was thinking my light colored bell bottom jeans with this white crop top and a light blue knit sweater,” I say. I’m pretty confident about that outfit.

“Oh I like the sound of that,” she says. “Try it on for me later.”

“I’m just nervous,” I say. “Like really nervous.”

“I mean I get that. I’m not even going to pretend like I wouldn’t be acting the same way just before a date. But the important thing to remember is that Parker adores you. You’re going into the date knowing that. It’s not like you just met him on one of those god awful dating apps and you’ll be meeting each other for the first time,” she says.

That’s true. God, that sounds like it has the potential to be traumatizing. In a very real way, I hope it works out with Parker just so I can avoid that altogether.Then again…

“I think it’s pretty clear he had a crush on me back in high school. I’ve gathered as much. Which means he’s had a decade to just imagine what I’m like in a romantic capacity. And there’s a real chance I might disappoint him. What if who I really am doesn’t live up to who he’s built me up to be in his head?”

Emma tilts her head to the side for a few moments, clearly giving me question a fair amount of thought. I’m sure she’sthinking she can’t deny what I said could happen. It’s definitely a possibility.

“I don’t think Parker is the type of man who has expectations of people. He’s always struck me as someone who just accepts you as you are in the moment. I think he likes you for who you are at your core,” she says.

“And who am I at my core?” I ask, not sure I understand.

“You’re kind and caring. You’re patient and smart. You’re funny. You have a good heart, Poppy,” she says. “No matter what Wayne might’ve made you feel.”

Tears are close to the surface at this point and I really, really don’t want to cry tonight unless it’s from laughing too hard. But her words make me feel good. She’s saying them despite my distance over the years and that means something.

“Thank you,” I say. “I think I needed to hear that.”

Before she can respond, my phone dings from it’s place on my nightstand.

“Ooooo, I bet that’s him,” she squeals.

She’s probably right. I don’t really text a lot of people these days. It’s basically Parker, her, and my brother. She’s here and I have it on good authority that Theo is having some sort of special date night with Ellie so I doubt it’s him.

I reach for it and glance down at the screen. As I suspected, there’s a text message from Parker.

PARKER: Are you having fun?

ME: Yeah, I think I definitely needed to Emma time.

I told Parker she was coming over earlier today and he said he was glad to hear it and he’d keep his evening texting to a minimum.

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