Page 170 of Saving Her

I keep walking, thankful the house is unlocked as I slip inside. But he’s hot on my heels, snatching the door as I let it go, slamming the heavy wood closed behind us. “Don’t walk away from me.”

“Why?” I quicken my stride down the hall. “You did it to me first.”

“Jesus Christ.” He follows me into my darkened bedroom. “I almost had a fucking stroke worrying about you. The least you can do is explain.”

“Leave me alone.”

“I know you’re angry.” His tone softens, slaughtering me with pity. “But, fuck me drunk, Pen, what the hell were you thinking?”

I was thinking he had feelings for me. That I was more than a job.

I turn to him, facing his hostility head-on. With him in front of me, a stranger’s kisses lingering on his lips, my humiliation digs deeper, clawing at my mind. “I’m sorry I ruined your night. But I’m safe now; you can get back to what you were doing. Orwhoyou were doing.”

His eyes flare, shock and wrath beaming back at me. “You think I give a shit about who I was with? You think that’s why I’m mad?”

“Yeah, I do.” I return his glare. Fury to fury. Madness to mindlessness.

I cared for him so much. Without knowing, without understanding, he’d become my world. And now I don’t know how to breathe in the vacuum.

“I think you’re pissed because I stole a car.Wreckedthat car. But more importantly, because I disturbed you on your date.” I’m making a fool of myself. I can feel it. The heat in my cheeks is a glaring indication. I’m just thankful the faint glow from the living room is the only illumination through the shadowed surroundings.

He scoffs. “I don’t even know where to start with that load of ignorant bullshit.”

“Start by telling the truth. Start by acknowledging how worthless you made me feel.”

“Excuse me?” His brows pinch in a lethal frown. “Imade you feel worthless?”

“Yes. Why wouldn’t I feel that way when you left to have sex with a stranger when you already have a professional fucking whore living under your roof?” My voice raises with every vehement word.

“Whatthe fuckdid you just say?”

My cheeks flame hotter, the shame scarring me.

He stalks forward. “Don’t you ever talk about yourself that way again.”

“Why not?” I stand my ground, trembling in fury. “Fucking is the only job I’ve had. It’s all I’ve ever been good at. The only thing I’ve known. Yet, for some reason, I’m not enough for you.”

“Stop it,” he warns.

“You know it’s true. I don’t know why you can’t admit it. I can do your cooking and cleaning. You can even waste your time watching stupid movies with me, but I’m not good enough to fuck.”

“I said, ‘stop it,’” he snarls. “I’m not joking.”

“You did this,” I accuse. “You’re the reason I ran, because apparently you can’tget away from me fast enough.”

I throw Sarah’s words at him, hoping he’ll finally admit the truth. Or at least stop being angry at me.

The opposite happens.

His jaw tenses. His hands clench. He keeps stalking forward, towering over me until I’m forced to backtrack into the wall.

God, I wish I was scared of him. Even just a little bit. But the intense emotion taking over me is something different. Something starved for attention.

It’s hatred.

I hate how much I feel for him.

Hate that he doesn’t feel it back.

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