Page 86 of Saving Her

“Forget about telling him for now. We’ll do it when the time is right. But you need to make me understand what’s going on. I get that you wanted revenge with Otis. What I don’t understand is the way you’re treating your brother.”

He’ll never understand. And I don’t know how to explain it. The words won’t form.

“Do you think he betrayed you?” he asks. “Do you blame him for not finding you? Are you punishing him for being with Keira?”

Yes. Yes.Yes.

“It’s all of that.” I pull at my hair. “And none of it at the same time. I can’t think. Nothing makes sense. But that look in his eye… He’s judging me. He’s ashamed.”

“Penny, I—”

“Don’t.” I step away. “Don’t placate me. Or belittle me. You’ll never understand how he makes me weak.” I wrap my arms around my waist. “Sebastian is a vulnerability I can’t afford. Not when this will never be over.”

“But it’s already over. You’re going home—”

“What home? There’s nothing to return to.” Hearing the truth out loud only increases my sorrow. “I can never be free. And I can’t risk being around my family when I’ll always have a target on my back. You should’ve just left me there to die.”

13

Luca

“This is the shock talking.”I try to soothe her. “You’re going to be okay.”

Her suffering strips me fucking bare. I’ve never been sliced open by someone else’s wounds before, but she does that to me. She carves. Hacks.

“You’re either stupid or a liar.” She retreats. “You don’t know them. They’re everywhere.”

I follow after her. Step for step. “You didn’t think I could free you from Luther, but I did. You thought I’d fail in rescuing your friends, but I did that, too. So why can’t you believe me when I say you’re going to be okay? I promise none of them will be left standing. I won’t fucking fail.”

“Then you’ll die, too. Just like everyone else.”

I don’t know how to comfort her, but fuck, she needs comforting. And she needs to fucking realize her tormentors are all but dead. I won’t let them step foot near her again.

No new scars will be inflicted over the old. There are only the lingering nightmares to face from here.

“I can’t live like this, Luca.” Her entire body is wracked with shudders. “I won’t risk anyone else. The only person who is safe around me is Tobias because they won’t touch him. Everyone else needs to stay away—Sebastian, my family. All of them. I don’t want to see them ever again.”

“That’s not going to happen. Your family love you too much to leave you on your own.”

“No. You don’t understand.”

“I do. I get it now.” I step forward. “And what you’re feeling makes sense. It’s just unnecessary.”

“No.” She trembles. “No.”

“Come here.” I reach out. My chest tightens, waiting for her to deny my offer of physical comfort yet the rejection never comes.

She remains immobile as I wrap my arms around her and draw her into my chest. I hold her tight as she remains rigid. I cling to her as if my hold can fix her broken pieces.

But even now she doesn’t give in to weakness. There’re no tears. No sobs. Just silence.

She keeps everything bottled, the powder-keg of her suffering lying under the surface, waiting to explode.

“It’s going to be okay. I promise. We’ve all got your back,” I whisper into her hair. “Trust me.”

A shuffle of feet sounds near the door, making it clear someone is eavesdropping.

I expect to see Keira when a shadow passes the frame. Or maybe the kid. But when I tilt my gaze, it’s Decker who stares back at me, his expression of utter devastation letting me know he overheard at least some of our conversation.

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