Page 51 of Playing Pretend

“Are you shitting me?” She lobs the gin at me and I fumble to catch it.

“I wish. Julian went on to announce how unskilled I am in the bedroom.” My chest tightens at the admission. I crack the gin to ease the discomfort. “Apparently, I wasn’t the only one unsatisfied where sex skills were concerned.”

“Where did this whole situation go down?”

“At the bar.”

Her mouth gapes. “In public?”

“No holds barred.”

“Fucking asshole. What did Rome do?”

I shrug, staring at the liquor in the bottle. “I don’t know. I bailed. By the time I was on the other side of the pool, I turned back to see his fist cocked. I think he was about to throw a punch until I called out for him to follow me.”

“Why would you do that?” She scowls. “I would’ve bought tickets to Julian’s demise.”

“I was trying to keep my humiliation under the radar. Being told I fuck like a dead fish isn’t something I want shared in the work newsletter.”

Cassidy winces. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m stunned. I can’t believe all this—” She waves a theatrical hand in my direction, “—has happened.”

I huff a laugh. “You haven’t heard the worst part yet.”

“There’s more?”

“Unfortunately…”

“Well, don’t hold that shit hostage, woman. Tell me.”

I shouldn’t. The less people who know, the easier it will be to pretend it didn’t actually happen… But I need to talk to someone. To vent all the sordid details in the hopes they’ll take up less headspace.

“I kinda orgasmed against Rome’s leg in the pool.”

“No fucking way.”

I remove the cap on the gin and throw it all back. Gulp after gulp. Not stopping until the tiny bottle is empty.

“Girlfriend.” Her eyes light up. “You’re giving me more details. Don’t even try getting out of it.” She pushes to her feet. “Was it on purpose? Or some random combustion-type situation?”

I look at my friend. We’ve worked together for a while now and she has always wanted a closer friendship, but I’ve deliberately kept a wall up between us. I don’t have close friends. Only Rome. I’m just not that girl. The one who gushes all her thoughts and feelings. That has never come easily to me. But maybe I need to bring more people in close. Maybe I need to get all these thoughts and feelings out. Maybe a friend like Cassidy could help me sort through the mess in my head.

“On purpose,” I answer her. “I don’t randomly orgasm, which is actually half the problem.”

“How? Why? What the fuck?” She spits questions at me. “Spill. I’m dying here.”

“Because Julian never made me come.”

“Oh, my God. I’ve never been more fully invested in melodrama than I am right now.” She speeds me on with a twirl of her hand. “Tell me more.”

“I’m only giving the CliffsNotes because we’re going to be late for dinner. But Rome caught up to me at the pool and wouldn’t quit pestering me over what happened. So I told him the whole nonexistent orgasm thing. Don’t ask me why. I guess I thought it was better than telling him the truth about why my ex was with me in the first place.”

“Aww.” She looks at me with puppy-dog eyes. “You didn’t want him to feel guilty.”

“There’s nothing for him to feel guilty about. I just…” I don’t know. I don’t like how he’s forcing his way into the shady corners of my love life.

“Save the analysis for later and get back to the dirty details.”

I throw the empty gin bottle at the trash, hoping for a swish and not even getting a rebound when it drops straight to the floor to skitter along the carpet.

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