Page 61 of Rival Hearts
But that was just when it came to business. I could tell anyone who asked exactly what my plans were for the next five years, but in my personal life, mylovelife, I just hadn’t bothered to make any plans at all.
The thing about plans was that they could change. And the thing about love was that it could hurt me, and I wasn’t in the mood for that. I’d had enough, thank you very much.
Work was what I would focus on.
Except when my mind drove me crazy the way it did right now.
I closed my laptop with a sigh and stretched my hands up until my back popped. When I looked out of the window, the clouds above were gray and nature called me.
I wanted to head out to the beach.
I got up and grabbed a few things—a roll of plastic bags, rubber gloves, a trash picker, and a bottle of water. I grabbed apacket of cookies from the pantry at the last moment and walked to the street level, where I hopped on a bus that took me to the beach.
I never went to the beach to tan or swim. When I was here, I would do something good for the environment.
Today, my team wasn’t with me. They all had other things to do, too. Jobs, children, husbands… activism was a side hustle for most; it wasn’t their day job or their lifelong obsession the way it was for me.
But I could clean the beach alone. I didn’t need a team to make a difference. Sometimes, just the smallest bit of effort helped.
When I got to the beach, the swimming area wasn’t very full. The strange weather had driven most of the beach-goers away. The season was starting to change. Summer was coming to an end, and fall would be here soon.
I walked away from the swimming area in the direction of where the trash collected and remained untouched with so few people there. I picked up trash as I walked. When I was out there doing something good with the wind in my hair and the smell of the sea so overpowering, I felt like it cleared my mind.
My phone rang in my pocket. Alex’s number flashed on the caller ID, and I stilled. But he probably wanted to arrange a meeting for this week, which had been the idea. I couldn’t avoid him now that he was actually giving me what I asked for. But a part of me wanted to avoid him anyway because when I was around him, I thought things and felt things I wasn’t supposed to focus on right now.
“Can I come see you?” he asked when I answered.
“I’m not at home,” I said, raising my voice a little to be heard over the wind.
“Where are you?”
“Can’t we do it another time? I’m seeing you this week as it is.”
“Yeah… I just wanted to talk, to brainstorm about a couple of things.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “I’m not in the mood right now, Alex. I have a lot on my mind, and I’m just—”
“Where are you? I can barely hear you?”
“It’s the wind. I’m at the beach.”
“I’ll be right there.”
“No, Alex, that’s not—”
The line went dead, and I sighed and stopped talking. I didn’t want to talk shop right now. I just wanted to be alone. A part of me considered fleeing before he got here, but I saw a bunch more papers and plastic and walked across the sand to pick them up and stuff them in the bag.
Alex arrived not too long after. He wore jeans and a T-shirt, and he looked very different from when he wore his suits. I liked it when he looked like this—he looked almost normal. Human, where usually he was so closed off and almost robotic.
Although, under that façade I knew what he was really like.
I flashed on him naked, and a blush crept onto my cheeks as he walked toward me.
“How did you find me?”
“I figured you wouldn’t be where the swimmers are,” he said, jutting his thumb over his shoulder.
He knew me better than I’d thought he did.
