Page 53 of Almost Love

“Whatisgoing on with you?”

The urge to throw a tantrum was high, but she knew that Mack would take it. He wouldn’t back down because she was having a bad day. In fact, he would wait it out and then ask again.

“I didn’t fuck him. I panicked and he was so fucking nice about it. He spent the night and we talked. I really didn’t want any of these feelings. It’s fucking with my head. It’s beendaysand I’m still thinking about him. But also like…freaking out because what if this is just temporary and it’s like Xa—like afigment of my imagination,” she quickly corrected and sucked in a sharp breath. Clementine remembered belatedly that Mack knew about Xander. “I kept messing up, so they locked me away.”

She collapsed into her chair, chest heaving. Mack came around the desk and kneeled in front of her, hands cupping her face so she would look at him.

“I’m sorry I made you do this,” he said after a long moment.

“You didn’t do anything. I’ll be fine.”

“Maybe you don’t need to be fine. It’s normal for someone to take up all the thinking space in your head. Instead of fighting it, go with the flow?”

What if I’m trying to banish one and hold onto the other?

She nodded slowly and forced herself to breathe through it. Oakley already took up so much room in her head. This wouldn’t be any different. Right now, she was leaving everything in his hands. While he wouldn’t take advantage of that, she wanted some control over the situation. Or at least the illusion of control.

“Are you going to be okay?”

“Eventually.” She sighed and gestured to the box filled with bottles in the corner. “That’s for you.”

“You’re getting rid of your alcohol?”

Nodding, she dragged her fingers through her hair. “He’s…uh, Oakley is in recovery. Figured I should probably get rid of all that stuff from my house.”

Mack looked like he wanted to say something, but chose to pick up the box instead. “Come by for dinner tonight. Dig’s got something they want to show you.”

She smiled, a genuine one this time. Because an evening with Mack and Indigo would heal her completely.

The next day, after the most relaxing dinner with the MacArthur duo—Indigo made an installation inspired by Clementine and her business for a school project—she was feeling much better. She even woke up on the right side of the bed and got into work early. She made fresh batches of donuts, cookies and breakfast pastries before sitting down to knock out some cake recipes. Her inbox was flooded with requests for her to do wedding cakes, so she referred them to Wildes Events + Weddings, because that was the only way she was taking on work right now.

By the time her staff started trickling in, she had a bunch of new ideas for them to try out. She wrote them on the whiteboard and then turned to face them with an awkward smile. “I want to apologize for how I’ve been the last few days. There’s been a lot on my mind and I know that I should have said something before. I just…”

“It’s okay, chef, we get it. Some days are good mental health days and others aren’t. But you’re doing okay?” Freya asked.

She nodded, looking at each of them. “Yeah. I’m okay. And in case it wasn’t obvious yet, if any of you have days like that, please let me know. Despite my need to push through and work so I can screw everything up, that’s not what we should be doing.”

“You got it, boss,” Roscoe told her, shooting finger guns before he turned his attention to the white board. All of them smiled and settled in for the day. Once she’d answered questions about the day’s schedule, everybody put on their aprons and got started on the cakes. While her team might have been worried about her, they also worked their asses off to keep the place running and for that she was incredibly appreciative.

Standing in the doorway of her office, she fidgeted with her phone. This fling with Oakley was going in the right direction and at a suitable pace. However, her feelings were all over the place and she needed to contain them somehow. Take back some of that control she thought she had. Chewing on her lip, she opened up their text chain and sent him a message.

Clementine

I’ll bring the donuts to you today.

Oakley

Good morning to you too, sugarplum.

Clementine

Nope.

Oakley

Jellybean?

Clementine

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