Page 1 of Almost Always

PROLOGUE

09 · 02 · 2003

Daisy,

It’s been a week since you left. A week since I watched the car vanish into the horizon. I always believed that if you were going to be riding off into the sunset, it would be with me. I love your dad, but it should have been me.

I thought we’d have more time, that summer would never end. That I’d get to keep you by my side for the rest of eternity. Yet, you’re not here. I keep looking to my right to say something and find the space empty.

Fuck, I sound like such a sap. But that’s what you’ve done to me. We barely had enough time to figure out what this was before you left. Why did we wait so long? I should have said or done something years ago, I shouldhave made my move. I kept convincing myself that you didn’t feel the same and I’d make everything so fucking awkward. If only I knew…

I fucking miss you, Hero.

I also didn’t get a chance to tell you something: I love you.

I hope that I get to look into your eyes and say that out loud one day. I don’t care how long it takes, I’m going to do everything to find my way back to you. Back into the circle of your arms and those soothing hugs, back to inhaling the lavender scent that clings to you every single day. Back to you.

Because with you is where I belong.

Always.

Love,

Rafferty

CHAPTER 1

MARCH, PRESENT DAY

“You don’t go there, but maybe you could fit here,” Daisy murmured to herself as she worked. The cube of green foam sitting in front of her had holes everywhere from constant poking and prodding. She moved the stem of carnations from the back to the front and tilted her head as she examined the arrangement again. There was something missing and she was at a loss for what it might be. “What else do you need?” she asked the flowers with a heavy sigh. Her words were echoed by a similar question in the deep breathy voice of one of her favorite male narrators in her audiobook. Twisting her lips to the side, Daisy yanked everything out of the foam and spread the flowers across the table.

I guess today isnotthe day to try something new.

As the queen of multitasking, Daisy Heroux could do three things at once if needed. That afternoon, however, she settled on two. She was listening to an audiobook and completely engrossed in the story of a firefighter falling in love with the single dad she’d saved a few days ago. They were having sex for the first time and the narrators were doing such a good job of keeping her hooked. Usually, whatever she was listeningto helped her focus on the other tasks at hand. But she was struggling with this bouquet. She didn’t know why the flowers weren’t working together or looking the way it did in her head.

To most people that might seem like a lot at one time, but Daisy thrived in this kind of environment. The busier she was, the better for her mind. When things got quiet, she tended to overthink and worry. Anxiety had been her constant companion since she was a kid, but with regular therapy and medication she’d found a way to deal.Almost. Multitasking was the best way to distract her mind, even if her therapist liked to remind her it was a form of avoidance. There were only so many times she could think about her childhood and not fall apart.

The audiobook cut off mid-sentence and her phone started ringing. She smiled at the photograph of her father filling the screen and answered the call.

“Papa Bear.”

“Flower girl,” he said with a soft laugh. He’d called her that since she was a kid in New York, when he’d come home after work trips to find her with wildflowers in her hair. Daniel Matthew insisted she’d been named after his favorite flower and while she’d never seen him with a single daisy her whole life, she believed him.

In the years since, flowers had become the biggest part of her life. Thanks to the first boy she had loved.

Her heart lurched at the thought ofhimand she touched the bill of the faded mustard cap with the tips of her fingers and dragged them around to trace the three letters embroidered onto the back—REA.

“How’s it going, kid?”

“It’s…going,” she replied with a chuckle. “Where in the world are you right now?”

“Casablanca.”

“Is it as beautiful as all the pictures say it is?”

Her father laughed. “It’s better. I wish you could have come with us.”

“There’s nothing fun about being a third wheel with your dad and his wife.”

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