Page 47 of Stumped

A heavy sigh moves through me and her head pops up, forehead wrinkled.

“What’s wrong?”

“Tired, that’s all.”

She doesn’t believe me and I don’t blame her, it wasn’t a very convincing lie. I try to smile, but fail at that as well. As always, my thoughts are fixed on my failures. Between struggling through healing, not being able to play cricket for close to a year and being an average human for this fantastic specimen of a person, I’m at max capacity for pity parties. But it’s hard to turn those parts of my brain off. I know better than to say it out loud, because I’ll get another lecture.

“Elias.” She puts so much emphasis on my name, I can’t hide the wince.

“I’m okay, peaches. I swear.”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

I chuckle. “That’s a good thing, right?” Her stare is unrelenting and I sigh. “Thinking about PT. Dr. Theo promised a gruelling session today and I am not looking forward to it.”

“Think of all the positives, though. Maybe this will be the day everything changes.”

Her faith in me is what keeps me going. If Vera thinks everything will work out, I believe it will. So I nod, making sure my smile is genuine. She cradles my face and searches my eyesbefore kissing me. It’s a quick, soft peck, but enough to erase the panic in my head. When she pulls back, I can see concern in her gaze, but she doesn’t say anything. She settles against me, engrossed in the goings-on of AFC Richmond.

I stare at the screen, but my brain is replaying my conversation with Coach Kumaran yesterday. As the batting coach for the Renegades, he’s the one I work with the most. He’s also a coach for the Indian team, so we know each other pretty well. And yet, I couldn’t decipher his mood when he pulled me aside after the Hyderabad match. It was an absolute shitshow and losing was an embarrassment. Nobody in the Renegades locker room said that, but the commentators and sports pundits didn’t hold back.

“How’s the shoulder?”

“Much better. Dr. Theo said I should be able to play soon.”

He didn’t say that, but I want to put in a good word for myself. If anybody can get me back on the field, it’s Kumaran and I need his absolute trust in me right now.

“Good. I’ll set up a meeting tomorrow to review your recovery and make a decision.”

“About me playing?” Optimism built in my chest, bursting into tiny shards when he spoke.

“Don’t get your hopes up. There’s no guarantee you’ll see playing time this season.”

I didn’t tell Vera when I got to her place last night. I didn’t even allow myself to think about it for twelve hours because I’m trying to manifest only good things. But accepting my fate is important and I fucking hate it.

Her mood has improvedthanks toTed Lasso, so now we’re sitting at two ends of the couch doing our own thing. Vera’s frowning at her laptop as she attacks the keyboard while I’m watching highlights from the game this afternoon—Mumbai Legends versus Kolkata Masters—to see what kind of new plays both teams have implemented. Even if I’m not going to play this season, it’s good to know what to expect.

Especially since Vera took her ‘minimal benefits’ deal very seriously and won’t let me do anything more than cuddle her in bed.

I’m not a sex addict, but Iama Vera addict and going without the taste of her skin or the feeling of her pussy clenching around me has been hard.Pun intended. Even though she’s not the biggest fan of constant touching or being held, she’s made adjustments for me. But when she gets tired of it, she’s quite vocal. On the flip side, we’ve been doing a lot of other things together.

Thefriendspart of our deal is reigning supreme and it’s been fun. She told me about growing up with her cousin, Tamara, and her sweet tooth extends to inhaling an entire pint of ice cream in one sitting. We’ve talked about our siblings some more, sharing anecdotes from our respective childhoods and what it was like to grow up with overbearing grandparents. She taught me how to play Rummy and I attempted to teach her poker, but that was a disaster. We’ve even cooked together, experimenting with a Malayali recipe book she inherited from her mother.

Everything’s changed and I amveryworried for myself when it’s gone.

“What are your plans for the weekend?” I ask, setting my laptop aside so I can stand up and stretch.

“Ugh.” She also stretches, her large T-shirt riding up her bare thighs. “Couple of meetings in the morning, then driving up to Pondy?1 for the night.”

What the… “What’s happening in Pondy?”

She flashes me an awkward smile and sits up. “I meant to tell you and totally forgot. There’s a conference I’m invited to speak at tomorrow afternoon. I’ll stay the night and drive back on Sunday.”

I rotate my shoulder slowly. The usual twinge that accompanies the move is gone and my arm feels strong and sturdy. “That’s pretty cool. What’s the conference about?”

While I’m upset I can’t go with her, I listen as she tells me about a college inviting her to speak on a panel about building a business. Given all the research I’ve done and conversations we’ve had about Lucky Shot, those students are fucking lucky to have her speak to them about how to plan their futures.

“Maybe we can get dinner when you’re back? You can tell me all about how it went,” I offer.

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