Page 23 of My Orc Nanny

I was too late. My son’s punch landed squarely on Aswan’s stomach, his expression curiously intent rather than angry. “Wha—” I began, but Aswan’s command stopped me.

“Good, again.”

Benny punched again, then again, and finally the male let out a grunt, his expression softening into a smile. “I told you. Your shoulder controls the potential energy far more than your wrist.”

“Are you teaching him tofight?” I blurted.

Both males turned to me, Benny looking guilty, and Aswan looking shocked. “We were discussing how to use a hammer. Ben and his friends are improving the bridge over the creek and he needed to understand transfer of force.”

“Physics?” I mumbled, shocked. My knees gave out, and I sank down into the World’s Most Comfortable Couch. “This was a phsyics lesson?”

“In retrospect, I can see the confusion,” Aswan offered. “I’m sorry.” He turned to Benny. “I shouldn’t have used a punch as an example. I really hope you’ve been learning from taekwondo hownotto fight.”

My son huffed a put-upon sigh. “You sound like Master Sunny. Yeah, I’m not going to go out and pick fights, the whole point isnothaving to fight.”

“Right.” When Aswan smiled, my stomach—already knotted from that burst of fear—flipped over. “Sounds like you’ve been paying attention.”

Ben was a boy on the cusp of puberty, struggling with his own identity. I’d been meaning—for like six months now—to sit down with him and discuss the changes happening to his body and mind. The days never seemed long enough, and now…

Well, now…it was common for him to say something dismissive or mean, then stomp off. Or at least roll his eyes so far back he was staring at the back of his own head.

And frankly, I assumed that’s how he would react to Aswan’s compliment. But instead, my son flushed slightly,his hands shoved in his pockets, and stared down at Aswan’s stomach as he shrugged. “It’s a good class.”

I held my breath, trying to decide if I should speak up, but I didn’t need to. Aswan laid his hand on Benny’s shoulder, bent slightly so he could catch the boy’s eye, and said gently, “I’m proud of you, Ben.”

My son launched himself forward, wrapping his arms around Aswan’s middle for just the briefest of moments. He mumbled something against the male’s chest, then pushed away and ran for the stairs.

“Love you, Mom!” he called in a strangely choked voice, and I couldn’t even respond.

My fingertips were on my lips, as if I could hold in the sounds—thesobs—I wanted to make.Neededto make.

I’m proud of you.

Aswan had said that to Benny, and it had been just what he’d needed to hear. Just what we’d all needed to hear.

Fighting tears, I swung my gaze back toward Aswan…to find him studying me. Unable to remain still, I shot to my feet, half wondering if I should go after Benny.

But the worry in his tone stopped me. “Hannah? I’m sorry if I?—”

“No,” I choked. “No.” Itwasa choke, my throat thick with unshed tears. “It was…thank you.”

He took a step toward me, hesitated, then took another one. “Hannah, if I’ve offended?—”

It was as if his words released a floodgate, and I wailed, “How could you?” When he reared back, fear in his eyes, Iburied my face in my hands and sobbed, “You couldn’tpossiblyoffend—Oh, Aswan, he needed…”

“Hannah, what is it?” I could hear—feelhim so close to me. “Tell me what I’ve done, how I can make it better. I’m sorry!”

Instead of answering, I threw myself forward, the same way Ben had, and felt Aswan’s strong arms wrap around me. My sobs were ridiculous, uncontrollable, and nothingat alllike what I’d dreamed of doing when I finally landed in his arms.

And yet…

It felt good. It felt good to let it all out, to release the stress of these last weeks—these lastyears. And through it all, Aswan held me, murmuring words and apologies, sometimes not even in English, as he stroked my back.

“I’m sorry,” I managed to finally hiccup. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, Aswan.”

He was bent forward, curled over my head, his mouth pressed against my hair. “No,I’msorry, Hannah. I shouldn’t have overstepped?—”

“No!” I pushed away far enough to tip my head back and meet his eyes. “That’s what I’m trying—Aswan! Seeing the way you gave Benny approval—he needed—darn!” Still hiccupping, I dropped my head forward to press against his chest.

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