Page 82 of Rival for Rent

“I still don’t think you should agree to it.”

He finally looked up, shaking his head. “Mason, do you have any idea how much a place like the Butterfly Center would have meant to me as a teen? I had loving parents, but still, the support it would have provided? The community? I can’t put my own pride above the center’s existence. It matters more than I do.”

Kai closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose. I wanted so badly to reach out and touch him, to comfort him, that my body actually leaned forward. I grabbed a pencil off his desk to cover the motion. He didn’t seem to notice.

“Was that the center?” I asked after a moment. “On the phone?”

Kai shook his head, grounding himself with both palms on the desk. “No. That was Officer Branscombe. Calling to tell me they didn’t get anything usable off the security footage.”

“Nothing?” I asked. “But I was right there.”

“Yeah. They can see you clearly. But the other three people were masked, and it’s a big mess, apparently.”

“Fuck,” I said. “I want to see that footage myself.”

Kai shrugged. “You can ask the company to send it to you. I’m sure they will. But Detective Myers reviewed it himself, apparently. Branscombe said our case is all he’s been focused on for the past two days.”

He sighed, then turned and gave me a crooked smile. “I don’t suppose you want to go back to bed and fuck my brains out, would you? Because I am sick of dealing with the real world.”

My heart skipped like it had tripped over itself. My mouth opened, but nothing came out. My breath sped up. I stared at him, helpless. One second we were having one conversation, and the next, we were in a completely different one. I wasn’t ready.

I’d never be ready.

“Uh oh,” Kai said. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“I didn’t say anything,” I croaked.

“That’s my point.”

“Kai, I—”

“Oh god.” He closed his eyes. “Are you fucking kidding me? You’re going to give me the ‘I’m just not that into you’ speech? Today, of all days? Could you really not have waited a week? Or were you determined to add salt to the wound?”

“Kai, that’s not—”

“Forget it.” He stood up abruptly. “I already know what you’re going to say, and I really,reallydon’t need to hear it. Not today.”

He moved to brush past me, but I reached out and caught his wrist. “No,” I said. “You don’t.”

He looked down at me in confusion, and I turned in my chair to face him. My heart cracked right open at what I was about to say—to him, to myself. But I had to say it.

“Kai, I…” I struggled for words. “I think you were right. About what you said about me in high school. I think I was fixated on you because I was into you. But I didn’t have any framework for it. Not in my friend group, not at home. So I turned it into something ugly instead. I bullied you because I couldn’t admit I wanted you.”

He gave me a wary look. “Okay…”

I took a breath and let go of his hand. I couldn’t touch him and say this at the same time. I wouldn’t get it out.

“I’m so sorry for that. I was awful to you. And I think I knew that, so I tried to bury it, like you said. But I kept trying, because I’m just…I’m toxic. My whole life, all I’ve done is let people down. And I can’t—I can’t do that to you. Not again. It would kill me to know I hurt you like that.” I inhaled deeply, forcing the rest out. “So as soon as we catch whoever’s doing this, I’ll leave you alone.”

Kai stared at me, blank. “What?”

“I can go now, if you want. We could call that other service back and—”

“Shut. Up.” His tone was steel.

I blinked. “What?”

“Shut your stupid face before you make me want to smack you again.”

---