Page 74 of Endurance

“Ten percent, but that’s beside the—”

“Ten percent! Wait a minute—who’s paying Quinn & Wilkshire for me to be here? You or him?”

“I don’t see why that matters.”

“It matters because it lets me know how much stake Milo has in all of this.”

“Technically, I’m paying for it. Milo just signs the checks.”

I wasn’t sure what I thought about that. I never thought to ask before now, but now that I knew, it somehow made me feel like an overpriced prostitute. That just infuriated me further.

“I still can’t believe you would do this for him. That man is a snake!” I snapped.

Sloan stopped pacing to look at me. His face hardened, and his eyes bore into me, flashing with accusation. “At least he knows how to get me behind the wheel again. And he also doesn’t throw around baseless allegations—which is more than I can say for you!” he thundered.

My head snapped back in surprise as the meaning of his words sunk in.

“Are you saying you didn’t take the pills?”

“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t. Why would you care either way? All that matters is that I look good in the public eye. Isn’t that right?”

Spine stiffening hard and straight, I glared right back at him and snapped.

“It’s not just about the press coverage, and you know it. It’s about everything I’ve done to help youpersonally—all because I fucking care! I’ve spent almost every day of the past three months with you, and a good portion of one of those months was spent doing your PT exercises and practicing yoga to make sure you were doing this the healthy way. And this,” I said, pointing to the bag I held up, “this is not healthy.”

“What does healthy even look like, Kallie? For fucksake, healthy isn’t the way I was living a few months ago. It felt like I was walking on broken glass day after day, and the only way to numb the pain of what I’d lost was to escape into a bottle. I was miserable—resigned to the fact that my life had been ruined. But now, things are different. I have a chance to do what I love again. I told you before that racing was my first love, and I’ll do anything I have to do to hang on to it. If you want to be by my side for it, fine. If not, you know where the door is.”

I stilled, his immobilizing words cutting me to the core, slicing open my heart, and draining all the optimism I’d felt about our future together. Staring at him with wide eyes, I saw all of his pain and heartache for his one love—and that clearly wasn’t me. My eyes stung, and I shook my head in disbelief, suddenly filled with indescribable resentment. There was no stopping the tears that began to fall freely down my cheeks. I always wondered how many broken hearts one person could handle. Whether broken hearts from unforeseen disasters or broken hearts delivered by those I loved the most. I’d experienced many—but this was, without a doubt, the absolute worst.

I’d foolishly allowed myself to love Sloan so freely and so openly. I should have known better. The universe had shown me all of his arrogance and chaos, yet I still allowed myself to fall. My instincts had been wrong. I should have listened to the gypsy. I should have listened when Sloan said racing was his first and only love. Those were my mistakes. Now all I felt was a hollow emptiness.

“So that’s it then?” I asked. My eyes burned with more tears, but I refused to let them fall anymore. “Either stick by your side and watch you destroy yourself or get the hell out? Those are my choices?”

He shrugged.

“If that’s how you want to look at it.”

He acted as if he didn’t care—as if I didn’t matter to him one little bit. There was no going back now—no undoing what he’d said. The hard truth was just something I’d have to swallow.

“I can’t believe you would be so callous. After everything…” I whispered, unable to say more without losing all sense of composure.

“Kallie…” he began and reached for me.

“No. Don’t. Just leave me the hell alone. I have to go.”

Turning on my heel, I tossed the bag of pills on the kitchen table, grabbed my keys, and rushed to the front door.

“Kallie, wait!” I heard Sloan call out as I yanked it open.

I didn’t look back.

24

Sloan

Itried calling Kallie for the rest of the day but she wouldn’t pick up. Instead of fighting with her, I should have told her the truth. And the fact was, I didn’t take a single one of the damn pills Milo had given to me. Before I could swallow it, all I could picture was Kallie’s face, and I ended up spitting it out into the toilet at the last minute. I should have flushed the whole bag—which is exactly what I did after she stormed out.

Later that night, all I wanted was Kallie. I wanted to see her, smell her, and feel her. It was as if I was going through withdrawals. Instead of alcohol and pills, Kallie was my drug of choice. I craved her as if my life depended on it.

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