Page 23 of Before Their After

Everything I loved or cared about was left behind, nothing but a pummel of ash. I thought of James, the brother I’d connected to the most now left behind, without even a farewell. His grave was underneath a tree, acres back on our property. Our mother—left in the yard unburied. Uncle Harris and our father too. And Hunter.

Hunter would never find peace.

My family had finally felt complete, united again after James’s death years before the world had come to an end. His death had destroyed Seth. Caused him to leave and further torn our family apart at the loss of yet another son. It had been his fault. We’d danced around it, but it was true, and ultimately the reason no one had fought his departure.

If he hadn’t let his temper get the best of him, he’d have thought better of falling victim to a fit of rage—coming into the stables, slamming objects around had spooked the horse Jameswas tending to. The impact of his horse’s hoof had fractured James’ skull.

After months of no brain activity, our parents had made the best call they could make. My brother had been full of life. Finding joy in taking risks and relishing at the idea of spending a life outdoors. He wouldn’t have wanted to live. Not like that.

Seth had taken off the very next day. Moving from our ranch to work on a friend’s ranch out in Idaho. The guilt ate away at him, but what we hadn’t realized was that he’d sought out help. James had always told him he was too smart to let anger ruin his life, so Seth had wanted to change. To stop being an angry and temperamental person and put the past behind him.

He’d returned to the ranch shortly before things went south. Months later—once the dust had settled—things had begun to feel as they had when I was a child.

Things would never be that way again.

Lost in thought, I jolted as Seth pulled the reins on my horse. My mare and his stallion were now side by side.

“Reina, enough. Hey, it’s time to stop for the night.” His voice was even, but his eyes were rimmed red and the color had drained from his tanned face. I glanced around, taking in the scene before me. We’d stopped outside a cabin in the middle of nowhere, trees the only landscape visible to the eye. “I’ll go in, clear it. Make sure it’s safe.”

“No,” I said firmly, his head whipping back in my direction. “I’ll come too.”

The eyes so similar to my own trailed me up and down, assessing my condition, brow scrunched. Pleased by whatever he saw, he answered, “Together.”

Once the house was cleared, he offered up the couch, opting to keep first watch from the chair in front of the only window. It was a simple hunter’s cabin and there was only one exit. I felt his eyes studying me in the dark, even with my eyes closed.

“You might as well say what’s on your mind,” I said, my usual patience lost in my exhaustion.

He cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. “You sure Hunter didn’t slip into one of the sheds? Wait out the herd? If he left without a weapon, then there’s a chance he didn’t know how bad the situation was until he saw the smoke from the house.”

There were sheds placed randomly throughout the property. An attempt to lessen the number of trips we’d have to take back and forth for materials and in case of emergencies or waiting out bad weather.

Positive.I cleared my throat. “Yes.” My lie had been elaborate enough. To go further in-depth would make things … complicated.

“We should go back in the morning.”

No. Familiar panic rose in the form of bile in my throat. “Go back to what? A burned down house with momma in the yard? See if daddy turned or if the water had left Uncle Harris’s lungs? There’s nothing there for us anymore, Seth.”

The outline of his body stiffened, suspicious with the harshness of my words. His hands tapped angrily against the window frame, but he said nothing else for the rest of the night. I turned. Pushing my face into the cushions of the couch, I closed my eyes in an attempt to force myself to sleep. The thought of my new reality caused me to toss and turn.

My entire life, I’d been the odd one out in the family. Had loved the ranch and wondrous adventures I’d grown up having, but had always wanted more. And now I was going to get it. Problem was, it had become a world I no longer knew anything about. A world that scared me, full of death and darkness. I wasn’t sure I’d survive in a world like that.

Now it was just me and Seth. A brother who I’d spend the rest of my life harboring a dark secret from. I’d never been good with secrets. But I’d try for him.

If the cost of his happiness was my truth, I’d forever live a lie.

No Matter The Costs

SETH

What doyou do when you know the person you trust the most in the world is lying through their teeth? I knew my sister. Over the two decades of her life, she’d been nothing shy of a terrible liar. The issue I found myself having on hand was what exactly she was lying about.

A good liar lies through omission, while a great liar will sprinkle in small truths.

I’d never gotten away with much as a kid. Our father had a way of knowing my tells. I don’t know what haunted her most nights these passing months, but I was damn scared to find out. Family was everything to me, and Reina was the final thread left hanging.

Trust is a fickle thing.

A lifetime to build and only a moment to disappear. It was why I refused to let my mind wander to such a place that would make me question her. Reina had a good soul—it was what everyone loved about her. Surely if she had chosen to keep things to herself, there’d been a good reason to do so.

---