Page 30 of Cup of Lies

And once I’m home, it won’t be for long.

Theo drops us off in front of my house and then drives away. I exhale heavily, relieved he didn’t interrogate me. I’m suddenly worried there are spies watching me from the woods or hidden microphones waiting to rat me out.

That’s ridiculous.

Still, we can’t be too careful.

“Tonight is business as usual,” I say softly. “Pack for our vacation. We’ll load the car tonight and leave out in the morning.” I pat LuLu on the head, and for once, she doesn’t seem like she wants to bolt away from me. “Everything. Take everything.”

The girl beams at me, making her whole face light up like I’ve never seen before. My heart finishes shattering. We killed her smile. I killed it with apathy and selfishness. Others killed it with abuse.

Who were the others?

Whose yacht were we on?

These are all answers I need to work out and soon. Once I do, I have every intention of making them pay for what they’ve done. I may not be able to rewind time and change the man I was back then, but I can certainly change our future.

People will answer for their part in her abuse.

Every last one of them.

Once inside, I head straight for my cold, emotionless office. Is this the kind of man I was? Empty, driven by a singular need to find Calista, heartless? I feel dissociated from that part of me. Like he died when most of my memories did. This new man emerging is not a savior for just one.

He’ll save them all.

A new sense of purpose fills every crevice of my dark soul.

The urge to work tirelessly until I find all the monsters who hurt people like LuLu or Romy is so intense I feel as if I could explode from the anger surging inside me.

I have to be patient.

One step at a time.

The first step in this endless game is saving LuLu like I wouldn’t save her before. I owe this and so much more to her.

My office is sparse aside from a bunch of books that mean nothing to me now. I do empty the contents of my two locked drawers into my laptop bag. Once I’ve stuffed my MacBook in there too, I zip it up, ready to start packing the rest of my life up.

When I leave, I’m never coming back.

There’s nothing but heartache and pain here.

It’s a mindfuck of mysteries and madness.

I want out once and for all.

Packing in my room is easy. There’s nothing that isn’t replaceable. The closet is lined with expensive clothing I care nothing about. It’s not even fucking comfortable, which is why I’m not bringing any of this shit. On a whim, though, I toss a suit in the pile in case I need it.

As I’m packing the suit jacket, I notice something sticking out of one of the pockets. I pluck the white paper out to study it.

It’s a price tag for a dress.

I bring it to my nose and try to capture a whiff of her lingering scent. Somehow, I know it is a clue from my life with Romy. It’s faint, but I do smell perfume.

I’m going to find you, love.

These monsters have done their best to erase her from the internet, aside from the generic shit I was able to find. She’s out there, and who knows, maybe she’s under the same mind manipulation I’m waking up from.

The headache hasn’t lessened, which is unfortunate. It makes thinking and remembering painful. I rub at the back of my neck, realizing the pain is coming from beneath my scar.

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