Page 17 of Game Over

They grinned. “I know. I can see you there. Name lit up like a firework sincesomeoneis always my biggest dono. You know what they call you right? My whale.”

“I’m just supporting your work.” I countered, feeling the tips of my ears burn.

Jesse rolled their eyes. “Gifting a hundred subs a stream is more thansupport, Charlie.”

I waited for them to blush, but they kept their cards close to their chest now. In the beginning, they were weird about how much I donated, as if I was trying to buy our friendship or something. It took a while, but eventually, I was able to wear him down, finally convincing Jesse I was only trying to support his work.

Okay, so maybe I pressed the issue by buying him a top-of-the-line soundboard instead. Telling him it was either cash or lavish gifts… Apparently, in the Jesse world of acceptablepresents, donations were better than finding giant boxes from Rainforest on his doorstep.

I shrugged. “I’ve been good. Nothing new really, just same old same old…”

We both finished our drinks and ordered another, the same for each. The IPA left to gather dust where it belonged.

“You should get out more,” he insisted.

I shrugged. “I’ve always been a homebody.”

“Is the homebody at least seeing someone? If not me, maybe,” they mock gasped, “agirl?”

I coughed, almost choking on my drink as the burning liquid went down the wrong pipe. Jesse slapped my back, which didn’t actually help, but I appreciated it anyway.

“Definitely not,” I laugh coughed, still trying to catch my breath.

They pursed their lips, narrowing their eyes in irritation. “I don’t know why you say it like that. You’re a catch.”

Yeah, but I only have eyes for you,it was the same thing I thought every time we had this conversation.

Had I had hookups since I realized how I felt? Sure. And early on I even tried dating, but there was no use. None of them were Jesse and playing the comparison game always made me feel fucking gross.

So, I stuck to my random hookups when needed and mostly spent my ruts alone. It wasn’t the most ideal, but it would just never work out otherwise.

Though, there was a moment… A weekend I’d spent in a Heat Hotel with an omega that plagued my every thought for months afterward. But the timing was off, and by the time my life settled enough that I could contact her again, so much time had passed that I was sure I’d missed my opportunity.

“I just don’t want to commit,” I said, the familiar half-truth slipping easily from my lips.

“I still don’t get where those commitment issues come from,” Jesse said absently, playing with the little lime green bendy straw sticking out of his drink.

The long blink at them would probably have been obvious to anyone else, but even when I knew I was acting a fool, Jesse hardly noticed. Or maybe I’d always been so weird around him, that it just seemed normal.

Or maybe, he didn’t care enough to bring it up either way.

“Speaking of commitment,” they said, the excited edge to their voice warning we’d finally arrived at the topic that theyactuallywanted to discuss, shaking me from my thoughts. “Things with Tara are going really well.”

The hearts in his eyes made me want to crush the glass between my fingers back into sand, but I managed to force out an altogether convincing, “That’s great.”

A bit overly enthusiastic, my tongue nearly tripping over the words, but it did the trick.

Sort of insult to injury that the only girl I’d had real interest in had the same name as Jesse’s new girlfriend.

It’s like God justlovedto laugh at me.

Or, you know, maybe it was punishment for being such a coward.

They nodded. “She’s just so…amazing. I don’t know how else to put it. The other night we went out to one of those pottery places and made mugs for each other's places. She did mine orange,obviously. Little cowboy hats and everything.”

My smile was tight, but still genuine. Seeing them happy made me happy, even if it wasn’t with me.

And yeah, a little jealous too.