Page 63 of His Vicious Desire

“That’s my good deed for the year,” I murmur as I end the call.

Bianca

My stomach is twisting so hard it hurts.Gaetano thought I was a pain in the ass.Oh god.Stupid.I’m so stupid to have come to him.Legs weak, I make my way back to the bed.All I want is to go back to sleep and pretend I never heard him.

There can never be anything to feel, he said years ago.Because if Sandro found out, he’d kill him.I came to Gaetano for help with the hope therecouldbe something after all.I’ve never forgotten what Tracy said—since Sandro loved me, he would make sure I had whatever made me happy, even if that meant someone in the Outfit.With how fiercely Sandro swore he’d kill someone I wanted if they were in the Outfit, I didn’t dare think she could be right.

That was before Sandro hung up on me and wouldn’t speak to me over one mistake.Reminding me that no one stayed.If he was going to leave me too, maybe I could have Gaetano, and I wouldn’t be alone.But I was wrong, Gaetano didn’t want me.

“Bianca.”I find him crouching down in front of me, those black eyes soft and concerned.

In all these years, it’s the first time I’ve ever seen that—concern for me—for anyone.I’m confused.Why is he concerned if he thinks I’m a pain in the ass?

Only now am I able to take him in fully.He’s in a plain white undershirt and silky black boxers.The shirt is thin enough that I can see a thick mat of hair covering his chest.I’d felt it beneath my cheek as he held me while I cried.When Gaetano held me, I swear it felt like everything was going to be okay because he said so.It didn’t matter how big and strong he was, I felt safe with how gently he held me.

“I talked to Sandro.He’s willing and wants to talk to you.”

Ten minutes ago, I would have fallen over myself to talk to Sandro.Now, all I do is shake my head.I don’t want to talk to him.The only thing I want is Gaetano.

A hand cups my face, rubbing a thumb over my cheek.“Please don’t cry, angel.I’ll talk to him.He’s not going to leave you.I promise you that.”

Still, with the electricity that has my toes curling within my shoes.“Do you want me to leave?”

His sigh is heavy.“I don’t want you to go if you aren’t okay.I’m sorry you heard me say it.Sandro would lose his shit if he knew I wasn’t sleeping in the recliner.”

“So you lied to him.”

A small nod.

“I don’t want to leave.I want to stay here with you in your bed.But this time, I want you here with me.”

He squeezes his eyes shut.I know what’s coming.Determined to stop it, I lean forward and press my lips to his.It’s been years since the make-out session I had with a boy at Joanna’s sixteenth birthday party—the only time I’ve ever kissed someone.I pray he can’t tell how little I know what I’m doing.

His gasp is loud enough to fill the room and matches my own body’s reaction—it’s as though I’ve fallen onto an electric fence.Every cell in my body is shocked into awareness, and a need for more.The gasp opens his mouth to mine, and I thrust my tongue inside.A groan comes from him as a hand goes into my hair and holds me in place.

Gentle, sweet, his kiss is nothing like I imagined it would be.He isn’t a conquering savage demanding I surrender to him.Yet I do—I don’t dare hold back a single thing.I’m terrified he’ll stop if I don’t.Anything he wants, I’ll give him, the blood in my veins, the air I breathe, everything in me belongs to him.

Velvet, hot and wet explores every inch of me until my whole world is spinning fast and furious, like I’m caught in a tornado.Gaetano is my anchor, the only thing to keep me from spinning out of control.I cling to him, desperate for more of his touch, his kiss, his body against mine.

When my back meets the bed, I almost cry from relief.Yes, it’s happening, finally.

As if I said the words aloud, Gaetano goes still and tears his mouth from mine.“We can’t.No.Bianca.This can’t happen.”

Winding my arms around his neck, I refuse to let him go.“Yes, we can.Please, Gaetano.”

I thrust my hips against his and find him so hard, a prickle of fear hits me at what he’ll feel like inside me.Oh god, that’s going to hurt…

The memory slams into me: Gaetano’s hands on my hips as he grinds his hard cock into my ass.The words gritted into my neck, if it felt like he didn’t think I was sexy.Fear of how large he was and if it would hurt when we made love was there, then fell away as I slipped into sleep.

It had to have happened when I was here—the first gummy that knocked me out.Gaetano wanted me, has wanted me for three years.But he wasn’t willing to betray his best friend, my brother.My brother, who was now taking over Las Vegas, and Gaetano would now be his second.There would be no escaping Gaetano unless I was the one to leave.

Leave him?No.I won’t.Ican’t.Not now that I know he wants me as badly as I want him.I’m not walking away from him.And I’m done making it easy for him to.This is bullshit.I’m so fucking sick of following all the rules, being the good girl, because there has never been one single reward.I have Sandro hanging up on me and Gaetano walking away from me for three long years.

“Your brother?—”

“Isn’t here.You said that I was the only good thing in his life, and he won’t allow someone as dirty and damaged as you to touch me and ruin me.”He goes pale.“Yes, I remembered.Funny how the mind works.The one time you were lucky that I forgot.All these years, you lied to me.I’m tired, so tired of living with this longing.Aren’t you, too?”I run a hand over his cheek.“It feels like you are.Do you want me to beg?Is that what you want?I’ll do it?—”

This time, his mouth is savage, hungry, and greedy.He tastes of dark chocolate, sinfully bittersweet as it melts on my tongue.I don’t care if my lungs are screaming for air, I need him more.I need his heat to combat the one raging through me, burning me from the inside out until I wonder if I’m going to explode because I don’t know how it can be contained within me for another second more.