Page 8 of His Vicious Desire

And because I’m a good girl, I didn’t cry or beg to stay in the only home I had ever known the way I wanted to.I swallowed those tears down and accepted what I was told—like there was anything else I could do.

Later, when I was alone, I would cry.Because even though I hadn’t seen my father in more than a decade, I grieved the long-held dream that I had would never happen—he would never fall at my feet, apologizing for ignoring me all these years, and be the father I wished for.

Then again, I might not have had a father the way my friends did.However, I had something better, I had Sandro.Sandro was there in the middle of the night when I was sick, he taught me to swim, and he did everything he could so I would never miss the father I didn’t have.

After a year living here, I’ve come to love it.Not having to worry about cleaning chores or even doing my own laundry was cool.To top it off, I got to order whatever I wanted to eat whenever I wanted to eat it.It was kind of cool.

“Seriously, you don’t want him?He’s scary hot.”

I shake my head.“I really don’t.”Because he is scary, but not in the way she thought of him.The memories of my mother were fewer than I would like, but I never forget the way she would say loving a man like my father, a mafia man, was like loving a black hole.They would swallow you whole, and you would never be free of them.

I didn’t need to hear the repeated lectures from Sandro that men from the Outfit were off-limits to me.I didn’t want to get sucked into a black hole.Looking into Gaetano’s eyes, I at last understood what my mother meant.He would suck me in and never let me go.

Joanna gets it and hugs me tight.“It’s going to be okay.You’ll find someone, eventually.When you’re ready.”

I’m nodding.I smile to reassure her.Except I don’t believe it.I’ll never fall in love.Love hurts too much.

Gaetano

Closing my eyes, I let my head fall back to the headrest in my car.It doesn’t help.All I want is to go back inside and steal Bianca away.Everything in me aches with need to simply touch her again.

My phone alerts with a text.It’s from Sandro, asking if Bianca got home and everything is good.

The text is a kick to my balls, exactly what I need.His timing is, as always, fucking impeccable.I reply everything went to plan and she’s home now with Joanna.I’m not mentioning the warning I had sent to Megan’s father.I’ll tell him later, not by text.That isn’t something we put in writing—ever.

That’s what it was—she’s forbidden.That’s the only reason I want her.It’s always the things we can’t have that we want the most.It wasn’t the way everything went from black and dreary to technicolor at her touch.It sure as fuck wasn’t the way her body responded to my touch, how she felt pressed up against me for those few precious seconds.And I’m wrong.She didn’t feel like she belonged in my arms.

I shouldn’t have done it.I had no right to drag her down to hell with me, even for a moment.She was too pure, too sweet, too untouchable.

This night didn’t happen.Forget Bianca, for the both of us.

Gaetano

Sandro approaches me with a nod the next morning.“How did everything go last night?Bobby mentioned he was the one to take Kitty home.Why?”

“Because your sister is a brat.Kitty brought vodka to the party.It’s the same reason I sent Megan, who came completely wasted with a flask of her father’s home with the warning she wasn’t allowed within a hundred feet of Bianca by order of the Outfit.”

His eyes go wide.

“She called Bianca a bitch for spilling her drink on her.When Bianca did it to keep her from throwing a fit over me taking the flask away.”

His jaw tightens.“I can’t fucking believe Megan or Bianca.I’ve got one rule, and she can’t follow that.Thanks for adding that to Megan’s father.It keeps me from going after the little piece of trash the way I want.I’m putting an order in.Kitty isn’t allowed on the property now.I should have stayed.I’m sorry for putting you through that.Bianca’s usually better behaved than last night.”

“If she is, I couldn’t tell.She’s seriously spoiled.In the future, I’m not the one to play babysitter to her ass—please.I can’t promise you’ll get her back in one piece.”It’s a warning, and I hope for her sake, as well as mine, that he heeds it.I’ve already proven I’m weak as fuck where the girl is concerned.Only her far away from me is going to save either one of us.

Bianca

The slamming door warns me Sandro is coming in hot.Shit.Gaetano ratted me out.

I wince as Sandro pounds on my bedroom door like he’s a cop.Thank fuck Joanna left already.“Bianca!”

Opening the door, I paste a nervous smile on my face.“Hello, brother dear?—"

He shakes his head the moment he sees me.“No.Don’t even try it.What the fuck, Bianca?Drinking.I don’t give a shit if you think you’re grown.You sure as shit aren’t.You’re grounded from your cell and Joanna for a week.Hand over your phone right now.”

Sighing, I don’t bother arguing.He takes my cell phone.Yet I can’t help trying to defend myself.“It wasn’t like that.Megan?—”

“It wasn’t?Because you were so bad, Gaetano basically refused to ever have anything to do with you again.I’ve done my best not to have you around mafia men, but Gaetano is one of the few I trust and trust with you.Now, if I need his help when it comes to you, I’ll owe him times ten.You’re lucky it’s just a week.Kitty isn’t allowed on the property, and Megan is out.Megan and her family have been warned by order of the Outfit.”