Page 153 of Wild Blades

“That’s putting it politely.” I lean back against the kitchen island and fold my arms across myself. “Why?” It’s a broad question and could mean anything.

“I was embarrassed.”

“Of me?”Fuck, that hurts.

“No.” He turns to face me, his face full of panic. “Of what I did. To my wife. My friend. My family. My unborn son.”

“I’myour son.”

He frowns, shaking his head several times, before letting out a defeated sigh. “It’s not coming out right, that’s not what I meant. God, this is harder than I thought.” He runs his hands through his silver hair and plonks himself down on the sofa, as if the weight of his confession is too heavy for his shoulders to bear.

“I was young and foolish. A fucking idiot. I ripped an entire family apart.”

“You both did.”

“I’m sorry, Wade. I really am truly sorry for what I did.”

“But you kept seeing her. For years.”

“Nicki and I?—”

“Were a business arrangement. Yeah, she told me. She’s a good woman. You need to figure out a way to hold on to her. She’s a better human than you could ever be.”

“I’m still figuring that out.”

“I’m sure she’ll tell you what needs to happen.” She’ll ensure she gets everything she deserves and will make Marcus follow her around like a puppy dog when this is all over. I just know it.

“You paid Miranda a lot of money.”

“To pay for everything you needed. You never went without.”

“I went without love or a good mother.” Thank the heavens above for Gretchen. “You paid her thousands every month.” Way more than the cost of monthly hockey lessons and new sneakers.

His face turns crimson. “She kept asking for more and more. She threatened to tell Nicki. Despite the non-disclosure agreement we filed agreeing none of us would ever speak about it, Miranda decided that wasn’t enough. She always wanted more.”

“So, she used you for money, and in return, she repaid her gratitude with her body?” God, that makes me feel sick.

He doesn’t deny it. “And I prioritized the team over doing the right thing. To save face.” He blows out a deep breath before continuing, “In the beginning, she was fun and exciting. A break from my responsibilities. It was thrilling. When Ritchie was away for a month on business in China, and from the dates, Miranda, and I both knew you were mine, there was never any doubt. And after you were born, I didn’t see her for a while. But then Ritchie discovered you weren’t his.”

“How?”

“He overheard a conversation between Miranda and I at one of our restaurants. She was telling me she couldn’t deny it any longer because you looked just like me.”

I do. It’s so obvious to me now.

“Hours later, it all blew up. And the rest is history.”

“Great,” I say sarcastically. That makes it worse. “You know you sound like a fucking asshole right now, don’t you? As well as pathetic and selfish?”

“I do. Because I was.”

“You still are.”

“I am.” His voice is barely audible. “I did everything in my power to uphold the team’s impeccable name and reputation, but I lost sight of what was more important. I’ve been a fool. I should have put you first.”

“But you didn’t.”

“And I broke Nicki’s heart. Zane blames me for everything. He’s so mad at me for allowing Ritchie to rip you away fromLola.” He leans his back into the chair and wipes his hand across his forehead.

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