Page 153 of Goaltender Interference

Nolan sat back, his gaze searching Connor’s face before he nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”

“Good.” Connor leaned in and pressed a kiss to his hair. “I’m glad.”

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

“Are you doing okay?” Jesse asked a little while later, when they were upstairs in Connor’s bedroom.

“I think so,” Connor said, suddenly looking very tired. “Today’s been a lot.”

“I know.” Jesse shot him a sympathetic smile.

“Areyouokay?” Connor peeled back the bed covers.

Jesse shrugged. “I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.”

“I do though,” Connor said, frowning. “I appreciate you being there for me and for Nolan but I wanna be sure you’re doing fine too.”

“I …” Jesse shrugged again. “Yeah.”

“Hey, c’mon,” Connor urged. “I feel like you’re holding something back.”

Jesse shot him a weak smile, then slid into bed. “I feel like this was all my fault.”

“What was?” Connor asked, sliding into the other side of the bed. He flipped on his side, looking at Jesse with a worried frown.

“The whole … the whole scene with Viv and stuff. And Nolan coming out and you having your religious crisis or whatever that was.”

Connor snorted. “Religious crisis?”

“Well, I don’t know what to call it. Your ‘come to Jesus’ moment?”

Connor’s expression grew even more amused. “It was more of a ‘move away from Jesus’ moment if we’re getting technical. Though we Catholics, we’re not big on Jesus the way some other Christians are.”

“Okay, well, whatever you call it, that seemsbig,” Jesse admitted.

“I suppose so.” Connor touched the cross on the chain around his neck. He reached up, unhooking the clasp, then let the charm slide into his palm. He stared down at it for a long moment, brow furrowed, before he set the chain on the bed. “I bought this cross and chain before my first NHL game. For luck. Figured I needed whatever help I could get. It represented everything I believed in at the time.”

“And now?”

Connor sighed. “I don’t know. It feels … like a weight I don’t want to carry anymore. Like it’s not protecting me. Like it’s not who I am anymore.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Connor’s voice sounded a little thick.

He got up and walked over to the dresser, pulling open the top drawer. He pulled out a little wooden box, tipping his palm sideways and letting it drop into it. It landed with a soft metallic clink.

Connor glanced up. “I think it’s time to let it go.”

“Is that really what you want?” He wasn’t quite sure what had happened in the church today, but it seemed pretty clear Connor had come to a big realization.

“It is,” Connor said thoughtfully. “It belongs here, with my wedding ring. Part of my past.” Connor closed the lid of the box and set it inside the dresser, closing the drawer firmly.

Jesse drew in a sharp breath. Damn, that was a big gesture.

Connor rejoined Jesse on the bed, picking up his chain and fastening it around his neck again.

“It feels weird like this,” he admitted, touching his sternum. “Too light.”

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