Page 121 of Beyond the Stroke

With Rory gone, I finish eating the breakfast he prepared for us, then Edgar and I head out to the beach to paint.

It’s a picturesque day and even with my woozy head, painting with the sunshine on my face immediately lightens my mood. Or maybe it’s the fact that even though things are unresolved between me and Rory, telling him about my ex had removed a weight from my shoulders.

Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want me, too.

I’d been too afraid to respond. Too afraid to find out what happens if I admit the truth.

thirty-one

. . .

RORY

He didn’t really want me.

Summer’s words have been replaying in my head all day. She had shared about her ex before, but I didn’t know the extent of their relationship and how he had treated her. Now, I can’t get it out of my head.

When she’d whispered those words earlier, they’d dug into my chest like a hook, pulling tight.

I’ve never felt this protective over someone. Never felt the rush of anger that came with learning the woman I care about had been treated poorly by another man. And how badly I wanted to track down the guy who made her feel like she wasn’t enough and wreck him. Not just for hurting her, but for making her second-guess herself. For making her believe she wasn’t worth wanting.

But this isn’t about the past. It’s about Summer.

Now I understand why she keeps pushing me away. Why she insisted on no sex or intimacy in our marriage. Why she throws up walls every time I get close.

She doesn’t trust it.

She doesn’t trustme.

And now I need to figure out how the hell I’m going to show her I’m not like her ex.

I could be patient. Give her space. Make sure she doesn’t feel pressure to take this further before she’s ready.

But the truth is, I don’t want to wait.

Not because I’m desperate for more, even though I am, but because the more time I spend with Summer, the more I see how she holds herself back. And not just from me.

From everything.

She’s made herself smaller by downplaying her talent, and her beauty. Pretending she doesn’t notice the way people look at her like she’s something special, because it’s safer not to.

I know what it’s like to be wanted for the wrong reasons. Valued only by who you know and what you can do for people. I’ve spent my whole life navigating it.

I want Summer, and whether she comes with me to Charleston or not, I’m going to show her how much more she deserves. More than whatever that guy before me made her believe was all she was worth.

She doesn’t have to be ready right now, but I’ll be here when she is.

thirty-two

. . .

SUMMER

Darcy forced me to come to Charleston. I made the mistake of mentioning it in passing at work and she immediately volunteered to cover my shifts. Then, she proceeded to send out a group text to Winnie, Cora, Whitney, and Vivi and she had my dog-walking shifts covered in less than twenty minutes. She’s dangerous.

After Rory’s morning practice, and my walk with the dogs, we dropped Edgar off at Winnie’s and Whitney’s house, then drove down to Charleston. We checked into the condo where we’re staying, then Rory had a few meetings before we grabbed lunch.

After lunch, we walked down King Street, checking out the shops there before we drove out to the warehouse where his Hydra-Fuel sports drink campaign shoot is taking place.

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