Page 30 of Someone Save My Midlife Tonight

“Can’t,” he replied. “I don’t understand it myself.”

“How is everyone okay then?” I asked.Comprehending why Immortals wanted a human-ish woman—whatever that meant—clearly wasn’t going to be solved yet. However, there were other questions that had to have answers.

“Zander and Catriona are the reason everyone is alive,” he said, glancing back at them. “Tory protected the humans and Zander and Catriona went after the intruders.”

“How many?”

“Three,” he confirmed.

“Did they get away?”

Gideon’s eyes blazed red. He smiled. It was scary. Call me crazy, but I found it hot. “No, they did not.”

“Can we question them?” I couldn’t help but feel this was all connected. Was it the work of the Higher Power? Did It think we’d make a trade for Alana Catherine? Shit, shit, shit. Wait. Was it the people who were after Shitty Ritchie? Again, that didn’t make a lick of sense. Shitty Ritchie wasn’t connected to any of the humans here in any way. No wonder everyone was freaked out.

“No,” Gideon said emotionlessly. “Bodies turned to ash cannot be questioned. The infiltrators fucked around and Zander and Catriona made sure they found out. The three are gone. Permanently.”

My mind jerked to the words of Jimmy George Carrots.Onnnnnneah offffffffff threeeeeeee.He’d spoken of three multiple times. Had he meant the three Immortals who’d tried to take a human-ish woman? How was that possible? It wasn’t. But… was the number three important? Was Jimmy George Carrots here to serve me like he’d said? Maybe, he wasn’t the confused one. It was possible I was…

His statement had struck me as strange at the time. Now? Not as much. I was beginning to think he might be part of the impossible puzzle.

The crazy in my yard was accomplishing nothing. The time to focus was now. Reaching up towards the sky, I slashed my arms down to my sides. Normally, that caused a massive explosion or an Olympic pool-sized crater in my yard. Today, it was the opposite of destructive. I sent out a wave of tranquility. Word by word, the yelling and shouting stopped. Slowly and surely, all of the people I loved calmly gathered around me in a large circle. Charlie nodded in gratitude. Candy Vargo offered me a box of toothpicks. I took them. Heather and Tim smiled. My siblings, along with the quickly healing Zander and Catriona, bowed to me. I hated that formal crap, but they were all about pomp and circumstance. Tory held Gabe’s hand and nodded her head in respect. Gram and the rest of the ghosts settled down. Poor Jimmy George Carrots had lost another leg, but still seemed happy to be with us. My biggest worry at the moment was for Candy’s kids and our human adult friends. They shouldn’t be involved in any of this. It was not their monkey and definitely not their circus.

I calculated the risks and the odds of who to send away with the kids, Jennifer, June, Amelia and Missy. They needed to be in a safe place until all of this blew over. I’d been told the Immortals had been after a human-ish woman. That made no sense. It stood to reason that any one of the people there had been in danger of being abducted. We had to eliminate the possibility of danger for those who couldn’t defend themselves.

This wasn’t a dictatorship. I worked well with input from those who had far more experience than I did. “We need to get the kids and anyone not Immortal out of here.”

“Agreed,” Gideon said. “I have safe houses all over the world. I’d suggest relocating the children, June, Amelia, Missy and Jenniferimmediately.”

“It’s prudent,” Charlie stated. He hadn’t let go of his wife. June didn’t mind a bit. Their love was sure and solid. “Gabe, can you take charge?”

Gabe nodded to Charlie. My brother was the Archangel Gabriel. He was a badass, smart and one of the kindest people I knew. “Of course. I’d like to take Tory, Rafe, Abby and Prue with me to protect the humans.”

“As you wish,” Charlie said.

Zander stepped forward. “Catriona and I will go as well, if we can be spared. We need healing time and can transport back if needed.”

The request was smart. If we had Charlie, Heather, Tim, Candy Vargo, Gideon and me, we were covered for a battle royale. Hell, Shitty Ritchie might even come in handy with a tornado or two.

“Tory, Zander and Catriona, what can you tell us about the attack?” I asked.

Tory shook her head. Her normally pale skin was even paler. The woman was still stunning. “There were three. I didn’t recognize any of them. They demanded the human-ish woman but weren’t clear on which one.”

“I’d have to surmise that they were neither Angel nor Demon,” Zander added. “Their eyes were soulless and the speech was formal—monotone and flat.”

Catriona stepped forward. “Robotic,” she clarified. “Unlike anything or anyone I’ve come across.”

“SHIT,” Shitty Ritchie screeched, hopping off of Tim’s shoulder and running to the center of the circle. “Eyes. Color?”

“White,” Tory said. “The entire eye including the iris was milky white.”

“Shit motherfucker shitass,” Shitty Ritchie shrieked in apitch so high I was sure all the glass in Georgia just shattered. “Bald?”

Tory’s expression showed surprise. “Yes.”

“Thin lips, no teeth?” he questioned.

Zander nodded slowly. He began to glow menacingly and didn’t look happy. He might not be healed, but he was still a dangerous man. Shitty Ritchie hadn’t come here with a great reputation and he wasn’t helping himself currently. “Yes. Do you know them?”

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