Page 5 of Someone Save My Midlife Tonight

“To who?” I asked with a sinking feeling.

“The one who performs the spell and the one who receives it.”

“Care to be more specific?” I pressed, already knowing that the method was probably a hard no.

Gideon took my hand and led me over to the settee beneath the window. The afternoon sunlight streaming in cast an angelic glow around the Demon. It was right. The Demon was a better person than many of the Angels I’d met thus far.

“I’ve never witnessed it—the spell,” he said, choosing his words carefully. “I’ve only heard tell.” He paused and I waited. If he didn’t explain himself in a timely manner, my knee was awfully close to his junk. “There’s a way to age a person without their consent.”

“More,” I insisted, hoping to the Darkness and back we didn’t have to use this method. However, if the Higher Power was indeed after my baby, the choice might not be ours to make. Discovering what Alana Catherine knewwas imperative.

Gideon pressed his temples and looked like he truly wanted to do some property damage. I wasn’t far behind.

“I think it’s a bad plan,” he finally said. “Again,ifthe stories are true, Candy Vargo knows how to cast the spell.”

“Okay,” I said, trying to understand what was basically incomprehensible. “Candy Vargo’s still alive and well. If she’s cast this spell before, then she did it correctly.”

“If,” Gideon reminded me. “Ifshe cast the spell, then, yes, it was successful. Doesn’t mean it will be again. Risking both Alana Catherine and Candy would be catastrophic.”

“Got it,” I said, standing up. “Air. I need fresh air and our little one does too.”

Alana Catherine squealed. An honest and very real smile pulled at the corner of my lips.

“I think that’s a good plan,” Gideon said, taking our daughter from my arms and cuddling her close. His demeanor changed on a dime. With a sly smile and a twinkle in his eyes, he winked at me. “There might or might not be a surprise waiting outside for you two.”

“Umm… I’ve kind of had enough surprises lately,” I admitted with a weak laugh, taking in the beauty of the image of a father holding his daughter.

“This is one you’ll love. I promise.”

“Works for me,” I said, grabbing a jacket for Alana Catherine. “Show me the surprise.”

“With pleasure,” Gideon said with a grin that made both me and Alana Catherine giggle.

If only life could be filled with good surprises and giggles. That was my new goal. Reaching it might be tricky, but I’d never been one to give up.

“Hang on, people,”Candy Vargo said as we stepped out of the master suite and into the hallway. “We need to talk.”

Apparently, the surprise would have to wait…

Wanting my surprise, I cut right to the chase. “The answer is no to the spell,” I told her firmly.

The Keeper of Fate squinted at me in confusion. She scratched her head, then her rear end, and then her head again. “What in tarnation are you talkin’ about?”

“The spell you can cast to age Alana Catherine without consent so she can tell us why the Higher Power wants her.”

“What in the ever-lovin’ corn nuts are you yackity smackin’ about?” Candy Vargo grunted as she pushed Gideon, Alana Catherine and me back into the bedroom.

“Wait,” Now I was confused. “Aren’t you capable of casting a spell that can do that?”

“Heck to the no siree. Who told you that bull malarky?” she demanded.

Her choice of words almost made me forget what I’d just asked. I’d never heard Candy Vargo say bull malarky or corn nuts in my life. She was more of an f-bomb user.

“I did,” Gideon cut in, looking at her with a perplexed expression.

I wasn’t sure if it was her vernacular or the fact that she couldn’t cast the spell.

“Don’t know where you heard that humpermother,” she said with an eye roll.

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