Page 29 of Knot My Type

“Yeah,” I say, the weight of it hitting me once more. “I realized too late that love is about taking risks. That vulnerability is what makes it real. But now, I’m here, terrified to even consider trying again.”

Fen speaks up, his voice steady and calming. “It’s part of growth, Eliana. You’ve recognized it, and that means you’re ready to heal. By putting those feelings on paper, you’re reclaiming that power.”

“Exactly,” Rhys adds, his vibrant energy returning. “And that’s why we’re here! Each of us has our battles, and we can lean on each other while we navigate the mess.”

I look at them, surprised to feel a smile creeping back onto my lips, despite the heaviness in my heart. “It sounds so simple, right? Leaning on each other and sharing what we’re feeling.”

Fen nods, his gaze unyielding. “Just remember that you aren’t alone. You have us to share the burden.”

“Okay,” I say, feeling that lingering warmth spread further inside me. “It feels good to share this. It’s freeing, more than I expected.”

The night stretches on, the fire crackling in symphony with our voices as we go around the circle, sharing pieces of our pasts—our failures, fears, and dreams. Their stories mesh with mine, entwining in a way that creates a sense of unity I never anticipated.

Kael talks about the pressure of leadership, the weight of responsibility heavy on him as he navigates the expectations of his role. “Sometimes, I feel like I’m climbing a mountain with no summit in sight. I’ve achieved so much, built this incredible business, but the loneliness can be suffocating. I think it’s because I’m always so focused on the next challenge that I forget to look around and see what’s right in front of me.”

The honesty in his voice surprises me, and I catch a glimpse of the man behind the stoic leader. “That mountain mentality—it doesn’t just apply to survival courses, does it?” I note, the warmth of the fire contrasting starkly with the chilling truth of isolation.

Kael snorts softly, shaking his head. “You’d think all the adrenaline would do something about those feelings. I guess not.”

Rhys tilts his head, a smile touching his lips. “I wouldn’t call it a mountain, Kael. Maybe a series of uphill struggles. But we’ve all got to take a break to breathe. You’ve got to come down off the peaks every once in a while.”

“You’re one to talk, Mr. Charm,” Fen chides lightly. “You hide behind your smile, but it wears thin with time. You hide your struggles with charm, but we know emotions run deeper.”

With a lopsided grin, Rhys shrugs. “What can I say? It’s my coping mechanism. I’d rather make people laugh than let them see the darkness lurking within. It’s more fun this way!”

“You’re allowed to feel those feelings, you know.” I interject, feeling that warmth gathering again. “It’s important to let them out, to share those burdens. No one should have to carry them alone.”

Silence blankets the room as my words linger. It feels heavy yet reassuring, a collective understanding settling in the space between us.

After a moment, Fen glances my way, a curious spark in his gaze. “What about you, Rhys? Besides hiding behind that charming smile, what’s your story?”

Rhys leans back and exhales slowly, contemplating his next words. “My family was complicated. They expected perfection. I was the ‘golden boy,’ the one who was supposed to make it big.” He runs a hand through his hair, the casualness faltering for just a moment. “But I struggled with that image. And when I lost someone close to me, the guilt set in. I felt like I let them down, that I wasn’t enough. So yeah, I joke around. It’s my way of pushing back against the hurt.”

“It makes sense,” I say softly, meeting his eyes. “There’s bravery in humor, just like there is bravery in vulnerability. You’re not just a face, Rhys; you’re human, and that’s okay.”

He grins at me, something light sparking beneath the gravity of his confession. “Thanks, Eliana. That’s nice to hear. It’s easy to forget when you’re so busy trying to project perfection.”

Fen shifts slightly, and although usually guarded, there’s an intensity in his gaze as he turns to Rhys. “You poured yourself into your work. I can understand that. I keep my head down and focus on training, on surviving. But sometimes I forget to look up and see what I’m fighting for. It takes courage to face the things we bury beneath duty.”

“I have a feeling this cabin is going to inspire a lot of reflection,” Kael notes, his voice steady. “Three months is a long time, so we need to make it count.”

With a sip of my hot cocoa, I catch the wavering flames in the fireplace, feeling the intensity of our discussions intertwine with the smoke curling into the air. This cabin—isolated amidst a snowstorm—wasn't just a prison; it was a sanctuary.

“What if we try something different?” I suggest suddenly, feeling the moment stretch like the flames in front of us. “Instead of sheltering our fears, let’s make an effort to face them—together. Let’s each commit to sharing our stories, the good and the bad, every night.”

“I like it,” Rhys says, a playful glint returning to his eyes. “It’s like our own little therapy group, but with more cocoa and less awkward staring.”

I chuckle at the image; Rhys, forever the charmer, seems to lighten the atmosphere effortlessly. “Then it’s settled! Every night, a new story—be it sad, funny, or triumphant. We’ll figure it out together.”

Kael gives a small nod of approval. “I’m in.”

Fen leans back, a slight smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Me too.”

As the fire crackles and pops, we each glance at one another, an unspoken bond forming in the glow of the flames. I feel lighter somehow, as if that weight has shifted just a little.

I take a deep breath, letting the warmth of the cabin and the energy of my friends seep into my bones. This might be the beginning of something transformative—not just for me but for all of us.

The snowstorm howls outside, but in here, it feels like we're crafting an oasis of possibility. I clink my mug against Fen’s, then Kael's, and finally Rhys's, the simple act bringing a sense of solidarity.

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