Page 13 of Wedded to a Wayne

The letter I got after her death changed everything.

My darling Two,

Your parents won’t tell you this, and so I must.

It’s a trap.

I’m kidding. I know how you love those space-princess movies of yours, and I thought I could give you one last laugh before passing on some of the hard truths you need to know.

Are you ready?

You are a daughter in a family that elevates sons. You’re outspoken in a world that prefers its women silent. I hope you get that from me.

But the car accident that took your leg gave you yet another obstacle. One that will hinder your ability to have more of a say in your future. Particularly when it’s time to choose a husband.

When the physician informed my father that I couldn’t have children, I became a burden instead of a boon overnight. The match he’d been planning for me, the one that would have given him rich in-laws to lighten his load, was no longer possible. He could not bear the sight of his failure, and so his son was made responsible for me as well as his own family. He brought me with him to America, wherehis son would eventually move me in with your brothers and you.

I was cared for, and caring for you was a gift, but it was clear I was viewed as the extra baggage of three generations of men. Unable to choose my own path, even though I had two good legs to stand on. Despite their affection, I understood that I would have been separated from everything I knew and loved if I’d chafed against my role. So I accepted.

I managed a few minor rebellions, as you know. I read every book my brother didn’t approve of. I snuck beedi cigars in my room late at night on holidays. I knew they were bad for me, but I’m dead now, so don’t waste time judging me for it.

You remember those little embroidered coin purses and handbags I used to make for you? I started selling them years ago to a shop run by sympathetic women who helped me open an account that my brother didn’t know about. My “hobby” was a bestselling item for years. And every penny has been saved for you, though that wasn’t my plan when I started. It was only after the accident, which everyone else walked away from without a scratch, that I knew who it had to belong to.

Be smarter than I was. Take this money and use it to make more. Build yourself a tower with it, one you can never be taken from without your consent. My nephew is, in some ways, as old fashioned as my father. And your mother is blinded by your brothers, as mothers often are.

For me, you are the best of them. You will find a way to have true independence and keep your family intact. And when the time arrives, you should choose your own husband or refuse to marry at all. If, however, you find a love match and have a daughter of your own, start a fund for her in my name to remember me.

And moisturize. I should have started with that, I think. It’s the only advice I always wished someone had given me when I was your age.

I made you smile again. I can’t see it, but I can feel it. I hope you smile each time you think of me.

I followed her advice as if it were sacred scripture. I used the inheritance to put myself through school and invest in Joey’s idea to save the world through excellence in babysitting.

And yes, I’m militant about moisturizing.

My parents let me get away with my own minor rebellions because of my “condition.” My mother in particular was never able to completely get over the loss.

But before the incident with Arush, I didn’t let my frustration with that come between us. Because I’d made a promise to my aunt to find a way to keep both my independence and my family, I came to dinner every week and endured the same rituals over and over again. The encouraging laughter at Niraj’s attempts at humor, the hushed admiration every time Arush had something to say. The movie that occasionally followed the meal, where someone onscreen would inevitably start dancing in the middle of a perfectly decent plotline, and my mother would look at me like she wanted to cry.

I once joked about suing Bollywood for pain and suffering.

Joey thought I should have told them about my part in the business sooner, instead of quietly paying off their mortgage interest or slipping money into their savings accounts over the years. He believed that would snap them out of the pity party they regularly held in my honor. But I had a feeling that finding out I’d made a fortune from Aunt Tanisha’s secret inheritance wouldn’t go over well.

I’ve never been more disappointed to be right.

I sneak another peek at Emerson and my face heats. Yep. He’s still there. Still gorgeous, with muscles for days and the softest-looking lips I’ve ever seen on a man…

Which is, you know, not the reason I married him.

Whatever you need to tell yourself.

I still can’t believe he said yes.

Getting married to avoid getting married might seem like the start of a bad joke, but it really does matter that this was my idea. My choice instead of my brother’s. Going through with this is the most impulsive thing I’ve ever done—apart from showing up at Joey’s place after running away from home. But even that was predictable. Joey has always been my safe place.

This feeling for Emerson? This is…new.

“You look warm. Do you need me to turn the heat down?”

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