Page 27 of Wedded to a Wayne

Chapter Six

Emerson

I wander through the bedroom, once again noticing the changes she’s made. There’s color everywhere. A red-and-orange scarf over the lamp beside the bed. Enough throw pillows for a small mountain.

How many of those does she have?

The dresser is weighted down with a collection of flavored lip gloss and jewelry.

For years it’s been me and the boys. Sweat and pine needles. Bare walls, muddy shoes and frozen dinners. This is better. Her scent. Her touch on everything. I can’t imagine going back to the way things were, and it’s only been a few weeks.

Not all of her things got my seal of approval. I moved her life-sized M’Baku out of my closet the day before yesterday and gave it to the boys, right in front of her.

She stared at me with wide eyes but didn’t say anything, because Barry and Lang were both too happy with their present. Other than Shuri, he was their favorite Black Panther character. I knew she wouldn’t have the heart to take it away from them.

She paid me back later. She tortured me, not with a reality show, but with the first of what I imagine will be many holiday movies, while I sat on my hands and gave her freedom to explore my bare chest with her mouth and hands.

“We’re working into this,” I told her, “but that doesn’t mean I’m okay with you getting off to another man. Real or not.”

“It was a present. Watch the movie.”

“Why? Why would you force me to watch Chiwetel’s best friend putting the moves on his new wife? That doesn’t fill me with holiday spirit. I’d rather watch that Tidying Up show again.”

“You probably think Die Hard is a good holiday movie.”

“It’s a classic. And The Preacher’s Wife.”

“Wait. Isn’t that about an angel putting the moves on the preacher’s wife?”

“Damn it. Now I can’t watch that movie ei— What are you doing?”

“You promised I could do whatever I wanted.”

“You can’t just put your mouth there with no warning.”

“I’ll let you do it to me.”

“Thank God.”

Today we had some hiccups. Barry was in a rare mood. He wanted to see Penny and Sean Finn. He wanted to go sledding. He felt like throwing his Lego ship and the ship in a bottle kit we’d been working on across the room and nearly hit his brother in the head.

He was overtired and concerned because one of his friends at school was moving away. He didn’t want to move away, he shouted at one point during his tantrum. And I knew that’s what his behavior was really about.

It tore at my heart, but I still made him apologize to Lang and clean up the mess he made. Not only does he need to learn that lashing out isn’t a healthy way to get attention, but he needs the structure of our rules under this roof to know that nothing is changing and I’m not going anywhere. Stability with Barry has always been the key.

I left him alone to get myself together so we could talk, but when I came back to his room Tanisha was there in my place. In between hugs and commiseration, they were labeling boxes and organizing his toys. The mess had already been cleaned up and his eyes were swollen, but he was smiling.

I might have been an asshole. My only excuse is that I was worried about him. But there was some jealousy mixed in there as well. I pulled her aside to explain privately that I’d told Barry to clean up on his own. That we needed boundaries. That she couldn’t just swoop in and save the day. That we’d talked about limits.

She, in turn, told me where I could stick it.

She didn’t look at me at dinner. Didn’t allow me to join them on clean-up duty. And she immediately accepted Langston’s request to help him with his homework instead of spending time with me.

I’m not sure what my problem was. Both my boys adore her in a way that surprises me daily, and I should be thankful. What kind of man wants his wife and kids to dislike each other?

But what will happen when she leaves?

“Thinking of trying that on?”

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