Page 40 of Desperately Seeking Mr. Darcy

I hold back an eye roll. I wish I were paid a dollar for every time Lady Catherine referred to things not being “canon.” I would make a lot of money.

“This is a reenactment. You could just walk there instead.”

“Jane doesn’t walk to Netherfield. Elizabeth does.”

“So what?”

She squares her shoulders. “I will ride the horse. It’ll be fine.”

“Macey,” I say again, trying to reason with her, but she only shakes her head at me.

“Mr. Darcy,” Lady Catherine calls out, causing Macey and me to move away from each other once again. “As my honored guest and nephew, I must insist you sit next to me. I must have my share of the conversation.”

“I wish to remain near Elizabeth,” the duke responds, not moving.

The awkwardness of the conversation silences the room, and I expect Lady Catherine—now standing and red-faced—to pontificate on the importance of proper seating arrangements and respecting the hierarchy of her table, or some other nonsense.

Instead, she takes a steadying breath. “Now that we are all here, let us go over our schedule for the day. But before we begin,” she says, a stern look on her face. “A most alarming report has come to my attention this morning. One of the watchmen told me he heard a romantic pursuit last night near the stables.”

I look at Macey, who gives me a small, imperceptible shake of her head, like she knows something about this and will tell me later.

“This we can’t have. It besmirches all that Jane Austen stood for. I must remind you that we will not tolerate sneaking out at night. Well-bred, single ladies and gentlemen must never be alone with each other. Remember, you promised to abide by the rules and immerse yourself in thePride and Prejudiceexperience.” Her dark eyes look around the table, and they land near Elizabeth.

Well, that’s interesting. It’s good that Elizabeth doesn’t have Macey’s tell-all skin tone, or she probably would have blushed a dark shade of red at this point.

“Now let us go over our schedule for today,” Lady Catherine says, moving us along. “After breakfast, we will meet at the stables for a quick course on outdoor etiquette, and then we will immediately progress to riding lessons. Once riding lessons are over, we will return for tea and a light luncheon, followed by rehearsals for key scenes. I hope you each have memorized your lines. It is imperative that you do this to make sure all our guests have the best possiblePride and Prejudiceexperience. Do not let me or Jane Austen down.”

These over-the-top tirades are exhausting. And we still have an entire week to endure them.

“Then after that we will begin our reenactment. The first scene will be at Longbourn, where we will enact that Netherfield has been let,” she says. “And tonight, we will have ourfirst dance, the Meryton assembly, where you will have the opportunity to perform the dances you were taught. Please note many locals who reside near the estate will be joining us in character and costume so you may experience the full effect of the dance.”

Everyone around us claps, and I join in out of obligation. Dancing around a bunch of strangers does not sound fun to me. I look to Macey, wondering if the upcoming assembly has lifted her spirits some, but she’s barely clapping.

“I think that is all. Tuck in,” Lady Catherine says.

“I don’t think I can eat,” Macey says, holding her stomach.

“It will be fun,” Elizabeth says to her, and I’m assuming she knows about Macey’s aversion to horses. I wonder how it’s possible I didn’t know this about her until just now.

“You also don’t have to go through with it,” I tell her, before ripping off a piece of scone and wondering if I’m even supposed to be doing this with my hands. Did they eat scones with a knife and fork in the Regency era?

“You said you wouldn’t try to push me,” she snaps.

“Yeah, but—“

“So don’t,” she says.

I back off. Because she’s right—I did tell her I wouldn’t push her. Besides, she’s clearly determined, even if it makes zero sense to me.

After breakfast, we head toward the stables. Macey walks stiffly beside me, still fidgeting with her sleeves. She’s added gloves and a matching navy hat with a feather to her outfit, and somehow, she looks even prettier with her red hair peeking out from under the brim, framing her face.

At the stables, Lady Catherine stands in front of us under an umbrella held by a staff member, her plum-colored gown billowing dramatically with every move.

“Regency society expected women to ride daintily and gracefully,” she begins. “I expect no less from you. There will be no riding the horses astride or showing off ankles or calves.”

“Yeah, that’d be a real shame for someone to see these sexy ankles. All the boys would come running,” Lydia says, lifting her skirt to show just a bit of ankle and drawing barely stifled laughter from the group. She and the woman playing Kitty—apparently sisters in real life—have been keeping things entertaining, and Lady Catherine seems to hate it, which makes me like them even more.

“I’m sure many of you think riding sidesaddle is uncomfortable,” Lady Catherine continues, not bothering to dignify that one with a comment or even a reprimand, “but the fact of the matter is, riding sidesaddle is quite comfortable, and you can be just as in control as when riding astride.”

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