Page 40 of Remote Access

“One who knows I find them creepy. He thinks it’s funny.”

Quincy racked his brain, trying to remember what a Precious Moments actually looked like and all he could come up with was cutesy cherubs with chubby cheeks and hair bows. And he wasn’t sure on the bows, either. But creepy? He eyed her Marilyn Manson ripped T-shirt and combat boots, her dyed-black hair and lip rings. Sure, maybe he could see how those things wouldn’t appeal to her.

“Look, we’re obviously in a strange situation here, so maybe we can make a deal.” Lane stepped out from behind Quincy and glared at him when he reached for him again.

“Your boyfriend is awfully protective. How sweet.” She smirked. “What kind of deal can two thieves offer me when I’m here to steal already myself?”

“And bake cookies?”

She shrugged. “I was hungry and because I plan to sleep here tonight, I was trying to get rid of that rose smell the parental’s new girlfriend must have painted into the walls. Do they make scented paint?”

“It is pretty bad,” Lane agreed.

“This is surreal.” Quincy, sensing absolutely no danger again, just shook his head. “Listen, we are here to steal something—one thing. It was stolen already and we just want to get it back to the person it belongs to.”

“You guys are like some fucked up Robin Hoods or something?”

“Or something,” Lane agreed. “It’s just a poster.”

“Let me guess.Metropolis.” She shrugged. “I’m not taking the gun off you because I don’t know you and I’m a smart cookie, but you can have that damn thing. I can’t resell it anyway.” She laughed and the bitter sound made the hair on Quincy’s neck stand up. “I may stick around to see his face when he realizes his pride and joy is gone. Stupid movie anyway. I hate all movies older than 1980.”

Lane gasped. “Toto, I’ve got a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore.”

“Terrible movie,” she snapped.

“May the Force be with you?” Lane crossed his arms.

“Nerdy fucked up Robin Hoods. Terrific.”

Lane’s mouth fell open. “Louis, Idon’tthink this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”

She looked completely blank and Quincy didn’t blame her. Lane had lost his ever-loving mind.

“What do you want for the poster?” Quincy asked, managing just barely not to roll his eyes again.

“Nothing. Just the joy of getting to watch my asshole father lose his shit.”

Quincy’s eyes narrowed. “Will he hurt you? If he knows you’re here and that thing goes missing, he’ll blame you.”

“Again, I’ve got a gun.”

That made him raise his eyebrows.

“Interesting family,” Lane muttered.

“Come on. I’ll show you the room of nightmares.” She turned, still aiming her weapon at them. “And to think I planned to eat chocolate chip cookies and veg onBuffy. This is way more interesting.”

“Finally,” Lane drawled. “Some culture.”

She merely snorted again and waved them toward a room off the living room. “Go on in. It’s not even locked.”

Quincy planned to disarm her, but the girl proved too smart, backing out of his reaching distance.

Surreal didn’t come close to describing the whole situation. No security system, no locks and a twisted barely adult who seemed to face life with alaissez faireattitude Quincy found completely disconcerting.

Burglary was nothing like he’d imagined it as a cop showing up after it had happened for all those years.

They walked ahead of her into a small room and the situation just grew stranger. Every possible robot-themed item one could think of from action figures to small figurines filled the room. Movie posters covered every available section of wall.Ex Machina, The Terminator, Wall-E, Star Wars, Chappie. And in the back, the only one in an actual case was the poster that had started it all.

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