Page 171 of Cursed Shadows 4

Slowly, I roll onto my side and crouch. My knees dig into the snow.

The glare I aim at Daxeel’s back is a swift one. He doesn’t look over at me, doesn’t break the constant murmur of his prayer, thewish and offer that he repeats over and over… until he gets an answer.

Hair falls into my face, torn from the braid, as I fold over myself, a bow so deep that my forehead grazes the snow.

“Mother, please,” I whisper, soft, and I yearn out my heart, my soul’s hand—for her. I lure her into my words, my offer, with faith. “I will give you my womb, I will give you my evate as he gives me… But not for my selfish needs or wants. Not for victory, not for conquering. But to save the light, as she is your child, too.”

I am not greeted with silence.

Mother was waiting for me—I know that the moment her swift whisper plagues me, scrapes through my insides and sets my teeth on edge.

‘Kill…’

I blink on fresh tears.

‘Kill…’

Kill him.

‘Kill…’

Kill Daxeel.

I lift my chin and bring my watery gaze to his back.

Far behind me, back where the battles have paused, perhaps ended completely, stares follow my slow, careful movements.

I am slow to rise up, but I am careful to sneak the hidden blade out from the thigh of my boot as I do.

There is no doubt in me that those watching will include enough of Daxeel’s allies, and if they see me draw a weapon and advance on him, they will call out, alert him.

No, I need them confused.

I need their minds scrambling to figure out what is going on up here at the base of the Mother Stone, at the torn earth that’s split apart and collapses into an abyss.

I bring my hand around to my front. It fists around the hilt of the short blade.

I approach Daxeel, his slumped body, his murmured prayer—and so, Mother has not spoken to him yet, has not answered his prayers.

She answered mine.

Kill him…

And the light can be spared.

My throat is thick with the tears wavering me. I feel them streak down my cheeks, gather at my damp mouth—but my steps don’t slow.

I loosen a shuddering breath…

And Daxeel stiffens.

He senses me.

I deflect the threat I have become. “She isn’t answering? Am I not enough of a sacrifice? Or do you have to truly kill me?”

Daxeel’s shoulders soften. Still, he doesn’t turn to look at me. But now, his murmurs have stopped.

If he thinks on it, considers the alternative of truly ending me, I don’t give him the chance before I lift the blade and clutch the hilt with two hands.

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