Page 30 of Out Of Time

When Max finally got back to his house, he unloaded his bag and made his way down to the beach. The heaviness of the failed road trip with the Condors sat on his chest like a weighted blanket. Taking off his shoes, he dug his feet into the sand, the natural elements seemingly grounding him, clearing his brain long enough to process what the next week looked like for him. It would be the first time since he was a young boy that he didn’t have hockey to fill his every waking moment.

The sound of the ocean calmed his racing heart, and he thought about the last time he saw Remi. Hesitantly, he pulled out his phone and stared at Remi’s last text that he had left on read; guilt shot through him. He had two options: He could tell her he needed space while he got his shit together, or he could ask her to take up space while he got his shit together.

Either way, he knew this week was not going to be easy.

His fingers traced over the text. He finally had someone who wanted him around and saw his flaws as endearing. Someone who challenged his comfort zone and was not afraid of his hangups. She liked him, and she didn't leave him guessing. The uncertainty he felt at the beach had been cleared up with one text from Remi, revealing so much about her character, her boldness, her relationship with her own emotions, and how aware of them she was. He both envied and admired that in her. He should have kissed her. Maybe he wasn't good at using his mouth to speak how he felt, but he was certain if he could press his lips against hers, he could use his mouth toshowher how he felt.

Max:

I’m sorry I didn’t respond sooner.

To his surprise, she didn't leave him on read, like he felt he deserved.

Remi:

Why does it always feel like you're apologizing to me lately?

Max:

Because I never get it right with you the first time.

Remi:

Well, I guess I should thank you then.

Max:

For what?

Remi:

For giving yourself a chance to get it right the second time.

And he would get it right eventually. Maybe he would have to apologize to her a million more times before that happened, but for Remi, he wanted to stick around long enough to not only figure out how to get it right the first time, but how to do it without trying.

Max:

I miss you too. I’m sorry I didn't say it sooner.

He took a deep breath and waited for her to show him this was okay—that he was allowed to say these things back this time, and that he was allowed to care for her and want her.

Remi:

There you go apologizing again.

Max:

Can I make it up to you?

Remi:

You don’t have to make anything up to me. You’re doing just fine, Max Miller.

Max:

Just say yes.

Remi: