Page 75 of Out Of Time

“Max,” Coach said, his voice cracking.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry I kept playing. Are you disappointed in me?” Max asked, realizing that the only validation he had ever gotten in his life was from his coaches, trainers, and other players, and he needed it again, this one last time, to be told that he was okay.

“Son, I could never be disappointed in you. Not when I know I would have done the same damn thing. We have hockey in our blood, and we will fight or die trying to win that Cup.”

Remi watched in silence as Max got into the car to head home from the airport. His body language showed his defeat, and while she knew she had said no more passes, tonight she would give this man anything he needed.

Before he buckled in, he leaned in and kissed her cheek. “Thank you for picking me up.”

“Of course. Your place or mine?” she asked.

“Mine,” he said, thinking about it before adding, “but first, donuts.”

Remi smiled over at her big, red teddy bear of a man. He was beautiful on a good day, but the sadness in his eyes only made them that much more green, more real, more relatable. She loved him. That she was certain of, and if he wanted donuts, then donuts he would get.

They drove in silence down PCH towards Seal Beach. Having no words with Max was normal for them, she accepted his silence but was grateful for his touch. His hand rested on her thigh, a reminder that while he didn’t always have the words toarticulate his need for her, his physical connection was always strong.

“You’re so beautiful, Rem,” he said breaking the silence.

She looked over at him, his gaze on her didn’t waver. “You okay?” she asked, knowing damn well he wasn’t but giving him every opportunity to speak about what happened at the game.

“It wasn’t low blood sugar the day we met,” he said quietly.

“No, I guess it wasn’t.”

He looked out the window, and then back at her. “I wish it would have been low blood sugar, Rem.”

“Me too, Max,” she said, placing her free hand on top of his.

“I’m scared,” he said, voice cracking.

She brought the car to a stop; they had made it to Donut Palace. “What can I do to make you feel safe?” she asked.

He brought his rough hand to her cheek, running his thumb across her bottom lip, then down the bridge of her nose, then over her jawline. His eyes were intent on her. Taking her in. Memorizing her.

“Don’t let me forget what this looks like,” he said.

“I won’t. I promise.”

“I don’t want to forget the details, Remi.”

She leaned over the center console, bringing the tip of her nose to trace across his. “You won’t. We will spend every waking moment memorizing each other. Loving each other. Learning how to navigate this together.”

“I love you, you know?” he said.

“I know you do,” she said, because she did.

“It’s going to be hard…Imight be hard.”

She brought her lips to his in a delicate kiss, her breath heavy against his lips. “I’m not afraid of hard things.”

“I’ll need a lot of help,” he said between soft kisses.

“I know, and I’m ready for it.”

“After the break, I’m telling the team. Coach told me to take the time off to prepare for it, but I almost wish I had told them after the game. I wish they already knew so I didn’t have to face them again.”

Remi shook her head at his words, taking his hand in hers, gripping it tight. “Don’t say that. Just because you won’t be able to play again doesn’t mean you’re not a part of that team. They love you, and they’re going to rally behind you, Max. Your name, your number, and your jersey will be woven into the history of that team for eternity. You’re Max Miller. You have your face on banners leading to the Condors arena.”

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