Page 71 of Midnight Wishes

A few swear words slipped out when he popped his boot to stow his work stuff and found the space bare and empty. An image flashed through his mind of his gym bag—fresh clothes inside—left on his bed that morning.

No avoiding going home then.

Alex’s plan wassimple. Slip in the front door, creep quietly up the stairs, grab his bag, and reverse his steps. Stay far away from the kitchen, where he could hear music and laughter. After near silently pushing his ajar bedroom door open enough to fitthrough, he realised his mistake. Celine lay on his bed, adorable face resting on her large paws, and began snuffling excitedly when she saw him. Erik must have opened up for her.

Alex scratched behind her ears, hoping that a smattering of attention would keep her happy, then stepped slowly back towards the door. Unsurprisingly, he was wrong. Celine leapt off the bed, bounding energetically down the stairs alongside him. When she saw him heading for the front door, passing the hook that held her leash without taking it down, her snuffling turned to whines.

‘Shh, girl,’ he whispered. ‘I know I haven’t been around a lot, but if we get up early tomorrow morning, we can go out for a bit. Just us two. And we can take a quick walk when I get home later, yeah?’

Because in addition to coming up short as a potential partner, apparently he’d also become a shit pet parent. Celine got plenty of exercise, with a walk every day, either by Maggie or the walker who came three times a week, but her nightly walks with Alex, Erik sometimes joining them, were her favourite. And between Sarah and work, he hadn’t been giving her nearly enough attention, often keeping her on short routes squeezed between the two.

Her whines turned louder.

‘Celine?’ Erik’s voice filtered through from the kitchen. ‘Come here, girl.’

At the sound of her second favourite person’s voice, Alex hoped she would run. Instead, her whines turned louder.

He should have just left, but Celine’s wide brown eyes had him pinned to the entrance mat with guilt.

‘Alex?’

Brilliant.

Lifting his head, Alex found Erik in the living room doorway, Abby half a step behind him. The sight of her body curving into his—like they were two halves of a magnet drawn together—sent a pang through his chest. He’d been so fuckingclose.

‘Gym tonight?’ Grey eyes clocked the bag in his hand. Alex nodded, trying to ignore the loaded look that passed in a split second between the couple in front of him. ‘Can I come?’

Subtlety was notalways Erik’s strong point. He famously hated the gym at any reasonable time of day, preferring solo home workouts, hikes, and the long runs he joined Alex on most Saturdays for keeping fit. When he occasionally used Alex’s guest pass to the gym, it was late at night, with a view to exhaust himself before bed after a particularly stimulating day. It wasn’t at seven o’clock on a Wednesday, when the flashing lights of spin classes were still going full throttle, people milled about everywhere, and a million faint streams of music escaped the ear buds around them. So his request reeked of ulterior motives.

To Alex, the chaotic stimulation was fuel, spurring him on to faster times, heavier weights, longer sets. To Erik, it could cause sensory overload in minutes if he didn’t take precautions.

And maybe it made him a dick to think it, but Alex didn’t want to worry about his brother when he really just needed to wreck his body enough to stop feeling anything. Although considering Erik had gate-crashedhissession, maybe it wasn’t too dickishto leave him to fend for himself. Alex had spent enough of his adolescence twisting himself around Erik’s needs.

But…a lifetime of protective instincts wasn’t about to go away because Alex was annoyed at having his catharsis interrupted. Even if Erik had never seemed to need or want it, looking after him had always been front of mind.

‘You’re going to be okay with all this?’ Alex asked, as they stepped onto neighbouring treadmills to warm up.

Erik nodded. ‘Took some anxiety meds. I’ll be fine.’ He didn’t need them all the time. Unlike Alex, years of understanding the condition he was managing meant Erik could largely self-regulate. But when he was heading into a situation likely to overwhelm him, he took preventative measures.

When his brother followed him to the weights section—cardio wasn’t going to cut it for depleting his energy stores—and started loading up a barbell next to him, Alex shook his head. ‘No. you’re not doing anything more intense than a resistance circuit while you’re here with me. I’m not dealing with your fiancée if you get injured two days before your wedding.’

Although Erik tamped down on his grin after only a microsecond, it was visible long enough for Alex to realise he’d been duped. ‘Yeah, you’re probably right. Maybe I should just spot you tonight.’

‘I’m not going to talk about her,’ Alex said a few minutes later, completing a set on the bench press while Erik’s face loomed over him.

‘Don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Erik reached out to steady the bar as Alex lifted it back into place.

‘You mean the whole reason you’re enduring this place tonight? Sure.’

Erik sighed. ‘I just want you to be happy, man.’

‘I was happy before her. I’ll be happy without her.’ Alex gripped the bar to start another set, but Erik clamped down on it.

‘Were you? Happy? Because I recall a conversation with my brother in January when we decided it was going to be fun to live together. That we were going to make up for lost time and play video games and watch sport and go out drinking together, and then I moved back, and I was lucky if I got to have dinner with you once a week. And when I did, you’d check your phone every ten minutes, in case a fire had sparked at work and you needed to put it out.’

‘Let’s not pretend you moved back for me, Erik.’ Alex gritted his teeth, pushing at the bar. But between the weights and the downward force his brother was exerting, it was a lost cause.

‘That’s not the fucking point, and you know it,’ Erik said. ‘You looked miserable then, even if you were trying to hide it, and you look worse now, although at least you’re being honest about it.’

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