Page 55 of Pleasantly Undead in Dark River

It was decided as a group, that given the incident with Kevin and X, perhaps it would be safer for the pups to be on Pack lands until we figured some way to get the random crazy vampires to stop turning up on my doorstep. It also meant temporarily shutting The Immortal Cupcake down until my life was under control.

I didn’t tell any of the guys, but it broke my heart a little. That afternoon when I put up the sign about our temporary closure on the front door, and then waved Tex, Brody and the kids off in the car, I went into the bathroom, filled the tub, and cried. I didn’t know why I was crying really, maybe for the happiness that was just out of my grasp. Every time it was torn away at the last moment by some asshole who thought I owed them something. It was like history repeating itself, and I was worried that I’d doomed myself to a life of this. A life of always getting so close to perfect but never quite reaching it.

The guys seemed to know to leave me to my misery spiral, but after a few hours, the water had gone cold, I had turned into a prune, and apparently they’d had enough.

Nico walked into the bathroom without knocking, and I frowned, swiping at my face.

Instead of saying anything, he shed his clothes and hopped into my ice cold bath behind me. He pulled me back into the hardness of his body, only a little warmer than the tepid water. I rested my head on his chest and sighed.

“Sorry.”

His hands ran up and down my arms gently. “For what?”

I didn’t know. Crying? Having a meltdown? Bringing all this shit into their life? It was all of the above so I just shrugged.

“You don’t have to be sorry for feeling, Raine. I don’t know about the others, but it's one of the things I love about you the most.”

A small smile curled my lips, but I didn’t turn towards him. “It's just been a hell of a week, you know? Or a hell of a year, if you want to be specific. I just want to feel normal, even if this is the new type of normal. I don’t want to live in fear every day for the rest of my eternal life, you know?”

“Hmm.” He kissed my jaw and my cheek, his hands continuing to run over my thighs. “Your feelings are entirely valid, Raine. It tears me up that I can’t give you what you so desperately crave. Normalcy. But I promise you I will continue trying until you wake up every morning with a smile on your face and no regrets.”

I turned my head and kissed him softly. “I don’t want to sound like I’m ungrateful. I got so fucking lucky, Nico. I know it. That I ended up here in particular. That I have your love. The love of the other guys. A family. I’m so thankful for all those things. I just want to be able to enjoy them without waking up every night wondering which one of us is going to be hurt, or killed, or if someone will try and blow me up or snatch me from my own damn place of business.” My self pity was turning to rage.

“I know. We will get there, I promise. If I have to kill every threat to you myself, we will get there.” He squirted some body wash that smelled like vanilla and man onto a washcloth, and slowly cleaned me for the next ten minutes as I just let all the thoughts whirl around in my brain, trying not to let the doubt and fear take root in my mind.

Finally, he rinsed me off and climbed out of the tub, holding out a hand. When I stepped out, I was more raisin than humanoid, and Nico laughed.

I slapped his chest with the back of my hand. “Take a good look, because this is what you’d be holding if you dated someone your own age.” I stroked my hand down his naked chest. “Or if you were dating someone with ball sacks for fingers.”

Nico leaned forward and kissed me softly. “Never change. I love you, Raine Baxter.”

The words had the same effect they always did. They lit my insides on fire, warming up my chest until I thought I would explode.

“Love you too, Nico,” I murmured against his lips. The smile he gave me was worth every moment of heartache and uncertainty. All the doubt I’d soaked in for the last two hours circled the drain with the dirty water. Nico was worth it. They all were.

Dressedand in a better frame of mind, I walked out into my prison, I mean house, dressed for action. Well, maybe not an entirely better frame of mind. Instead of a pity party of one, I was ready to kick ass and get my life back. Walker sat on my bench, his face furrowed with concern. “Are you okay?”

I nodded and moved toward him, stepping between his knees so he could lean down and kiss me. I sank into the warmth of his arms, and he dropped a kiss on the top of my head.

“Are you sure?”

I leaned back so I could see his pretty green eyes. “Yeah. Right now, I’m more than okay.” The look of love on his face was comforting. He was like a security blanket. A sexy security blanket that gave me dirty orgasms.

Bet Walmart didn’t stock those during their Valentine’s Day sales.

X passed me a glass of wine and I smiled gratefully, trying not to stare at the still raw wound around his neck. He leaned forward like he was going to kiss my cheek, but turned at the last minute to poke his tongue in my ear.

I pushed his face away. “Ugh X, that’s disgusting.”

X kissed me fast and hard on the lips. “Payback’s a bitch, or so they say, Love. Besides, I want to put my tongue in every orifice on that delectable body.”

Judge snorted from where he sat on the recliner. “That’s not as sexy as you think it is.”

“Yours too,” he purred with a wink.

“To paraphrase Raine, Jesus Christ fucking a frog. I’m happy for you guys, I am, but I don’t want to hear about your sex life,” Walker grumbled.

He may as well have waved a red flag at X. I was pretty sure he was going to drop it into conversation whenever he could now. I gave X a stern look and he just grinned back.

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