Rufio flew back to the closest tree and sat there, preening himself happily. Maybe that was his problem, and why he cussed so much. He didn’t like his cage.
Me either, but we were both free under the clear blue sky right now.
I listened to music from the streaming app that Max had put on my phone. The fact I could take pictures, search for information, communicate with all the guys, and listen to music on this one tiny device was mind-blowing. I loved it.
“Surprise, motherfucker!” Rufio squawked, and I raised myself up onto my elbows to see Max coming down the stairs. He was in a tight tshirt and a pair of shorts that hugged his strong, tanned thighs. His glasses were perched on his nose, the dark frames highlighting the heavy lashes around his eyes and their brilliant blue irises sparkling in the sunshine.
He looked at Rufio in the tree. “Surprise indeed.”
I smiled up at Max.So damn pretty.“You’ve trained him well.”
He shook his head. “I didn’t train him to do this. Must have been his previous owners. Did he try to fly away?”
He grabbed a nut from the little bowl beside me and held it out to Rufio, who promptly flew down for his snack, screaming, “Fly high free bird, yeah!”
Bursting out laughing, Max scratched his head softly. “Lynard Skynard fan too.” At my quizzical look, he sat down on the quilt beside me. “They’re a band. ‘Free Bird’ is a song.” Picking up my phone, he searched in the music app, and a moment later, a rock song played through the tiny phone speaker.
Rufio flew back to his tree with his newly obtained nut, while Max lay down beside me, on the opposite side to Doodles, who hadn’t moved at all. Even when I shuffled over to give Max some space. Was he okay?
I ruffled his fur gently, but he didn’t wake. A little more firmly. “Doodles? Are you okay?”
Max reached over and shook him harder.Oh god.Was he dead? I mean, we’d had livestock at the Homestead, and sometimes they’d died—sometimes I’d even had to slaughter them, though that usually wasn’t my job—but this was different. This little dog was the first thing I had ever had to care for and it had died within a month?
“Doodles, wake up!” I said, desperate now. I lifted and dropped his floppy head once. Twice. On the third time, he lifted it up himself, giving a deep-bellied groan of annoyance. Relief swamped me.
Max flopped back on the blanket. “I wish he’d stop doing that. I swear, every single time, I think this is it.” He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly. “He’s very old, and given his three legs and missing teeth, he’s probably had a really hard life untilnow. So if he does, uh, pass on, it wouldn’t be your fault, okay? It’s just the natural way of things.”
I knew that, but I wasn’t sure I was ready for the moment to be now. Snuggling closer, I placed my head on Max’s chest and listened to the steady beat of his heart. My hormones were wild, and even knowing Doodles was alive and kicking, my eyes still misted over.
Wrapping both arms around my waist, Max pulled me until I was lying across his chest, my body pressed right along his, and suddenly, sad was the last thing I felt. Desire so hot coursed through me like an inferno. I guess this was what August had meant by mood swings.
Unable to help myself, I let my legs slip to either side of his hips and shifted around, the friction feeling too tempting to ignore. Max stiffened, his arms tightening around me, but he didn’t stop me.
“Omega…” he breathed, his eyes hooded, his lips slightly parted.
“Max,” I whined back. Why did I feel so hot all of a sudden? “Can I tell you something?”
His fingers traced distractingly up and down my spine. “You can tell me anything, Beautiful.”
“I’ve never done it before. Had sex, I mean.”
His fingers paused, but picked up again quickly. “I know. Llew insinuated as much. He expressed that everything had to be at your pace, or he’d toss us off the second-story balcony.” There was a hint of humor beneath his gentle words.
I wasn’t embarrassed. Not anymore, anyway. If anything, I was relieved that if I was going to give myself to someone, it would be someone I chose—not someone chosen for me by the Leaders at the Homestead.
I nuzzled my nose into Max’s throat, his scent as comforting to me today as it had been when he’d dragged me out of that holein the ground. “I don’t want my first time to be during my heat, either. I want it to be…” I didn’t even know what I was trying to say.
“You want it to be special?”
I nodded. Looking down at this man—this Beta who would be a part of my heat, but not integral to it—I knew deep in my chest that I wanted it to be withhim. How did I ask someone to take my virginity?
As Rio would say, fuck it. “I want it to be with you.”
Max’s whole body froze. I wondered if I shook him and lifted his arm, whether he’d be as unresponsive as Doodles had been a moment ago. He wasn’t even breathing, but I could feel his heart thundering beneath my cheek. Maybe he was trying to formulate a way to let me down easily.
Putting my arms on his chest, I pushed myself up so I could try and read what was going on inside his head. His eyes were wide. “Me? You want me to—” He swallowed hard. “Are you sure you don’t want Llew? I know you guys have been intimate, and he’s your Alpha. Or Rio?”
I shook my head. The more he tried to find reasons why he wasn’t good enough, the more I knew he was the right choice. “There will be enough time for Alpha and Omega sex during the heat. For my first time, I just want to be Polly. Polly and Max. The person who changed my life and held me steady every step of the way. That was the first day of the rest of my life, and I want you to be there for this first step too.” I paused, because I was telling this to him like he was winning a prize. What if he didn’t want to be my first? “I mean, if you want that too.”