Page 125 of I'm Not Your Pet

“Huu-goh is okay,” I promised him, so he wouldn’t worry that he was in danger. His lovely brown eyes peeked at me through his fluffy orange fur. It was longer now than ever, and hung over his forehead. I enjoyed it, maybe a little too much.

Ushuu rolled his eyes at my hypocrisy.

“Areyouokay?” Huu-goh scowled, tapping his cute little toes on the ground impatiently. It had been three weeks of this. Of me skirting around his questions, avoiding his concern. Pampering and loving him in the quiet of our room, and pretending like danger hadn’t sunk its claws inside our ship. Like I wasn’t trying to outrun fate.

“I…” I smiled, hoping my spots didn’t betray me. “I am okay.”

“Liar,” Huu-goh reached up, his tiny hands trying to get to my face. He didn’t care that we had an audience, and truthfully, I didn’t either. I released my mentor, tendrils twining around my love’s little body so that I could haul him high enough he could reach. “Roark.”

“Little beast,” I murmured, nuzzling his sweet cheeks. “I am fine,” I promised gently.

“Roark,” he tried again, obviously concerned.

“Huu-goh,” I countered just as seriously. Huu-goh’s lips wobbled, and a snicker burst free. My worries melted away. He babbled something I didn’t understand, far too fast for me to catch the words despite how many of them I knew now. Then hekissed me, slow and sweet, his little tongue twisting out to meet mine—the way Sahrks mated with their mouths.

I shuddered.

“You guys are dihsguhsting,” Briar huffed. He’d walked over while we’d been tongue-kissing. I separated from Huu-goh’s mouth, watching Huu-goh’s pale friend curiously. I did not need to know the word “dihsguhsting” to know it was not complimentary.

However, I saw the way Briar looked at us with a mixture of jealousy and affection, so I was not offended.

“It will be okay,” Huu-goh said softly to me in his own tongue, one of his little hands sinking into my chest. He ignored his friend’s comments, his attention mine and mine alone. His fingers tangled with my tendrils as he smiled encouragingly. Apparently it was his turn to comfort me.

I hate this.

I never wanted to show him this side of myself.

It was my purpose to be strong—to be…big enough, smart enough, capable of protecting him.

I could remember the day that haunted my thoughts as clearly as if it had happened yesterday. I’d been a new recruit and the tragedy had occurred during my first voyage. Captain had been a practical man, his eyes only found the stars when he was looking toward where we were traveling. If he had dreams, he never spoke of them, but he was always warm.

He was everything I’d always wanted to be.

Reliable, tough, no-nonsense.

From the day we’d boarded and he’d caught me jotting down notes, he’d taken a liking to me. I climbed through the ranks rapidly, lucky enough to be chosen as a runner for him and Ushuu early on. After six months traveling through the stars we’d settled into a pattern together. Most of my days I shadowed Captain and Ushuu around the ship—learning all there was tolearn, aiding them when they needed errands run or messages relayed. As a nervous, but eager young man, his wealth of knowledge and example had meant the world. Captain was the one that had taught me that I could work through my difficulties talking.

He told me he had struggled as I did when he was young. It was hard to believe, seeing him for what he was now. Grizzled and aged, hard edges, and wrinkled surface. His spots never changed color, always blue.

Everything Captain said was spoken with purpose.

I hung on every word.

Not because he was perfect, but because he spent every moment he could making sure that I understood that there was no shame in strength built from hard work. He wanted me to turn my weaknesses into assets. He said that if I was stubborn, if I never gave up, one day I could man the ship on my own.

I’d always been large—gifted with a stature that turned most heads back home. But I had never had the gift of communication. My thoughts were often hard to articulate, they came out clumsy, especially when I was nervous. There had been many times in my life that I wished I was better. There had been even more occasions that I’d been convinced my struggles communicating would prevent me from achieving my dream of commanding a ship myself.

Captain taught me to work hard.

He taught me so long as you were trying, you were succeeding.

So I took notes. I devoured his words. I followed behind him, his loyal pink shadow. I guarded his room when Ushuu visited, redirecting traffic so that they could have privacy. I tucked him inside my heart in the space beside my father, and I prayed to the stars that one day I could be half the Sahrk he was.

The day that the ship was attacked had been just like any other.

I’d made my bed, taken a shower, dressed in my uniform. With my bag slung over my shoulder, I’d woken my bunk mate, Kael up. He swore at me like he always did, annoyed to be roused so early. Then we’d made our way to the cafeteria. We roughhoused a bit down the halls, and he talked a mile a minute about what he’d do when we reached our first planet.

Kael had as many dreams as I did, but while mine involved chasing responsibility, his revolved around escaping as much of it as possible.

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