Page 51 of I'm Not Your Pet

At some point, after tossing and turning, I woke up to realize that Roark was gone.

For the second night in a row.

He’d been even more exhausted when he returned in the early hours of the morning. But something felt…wrong. It just did. Maybe because I felt neglected, I wasn’t at my best as we made our way toward the cafeteria for lunch that afternoon. But that was just an excuse I gave myself, because on the third day out of our rooms I did something truly stupid.

Somethingridiculouslyfucking stupid.

In my defense, the buttons on the wall were barely perceptible. I hadn’t even truly realized that was what they were, at least until I pushed one and something actually happened. The little circle lit up beneath my finger, and I barely had a second to get excited about the new discovery before the hallway was plunged into darkness.

A lot of things happened all at once.

Roark roared, for one—this terrifying, frightened sound. The wall met my chest, chilly and hard as Roark slammed his bulk into me. A giant mass of sticky pink surrounded my body, encasing me like a rather anxious womb. It pulsed around me as the hot huff of Roark’s breath ruffled my hair.

My heart was pounding.

And for a single, terrifying second, I thought I was going to die.

But that line of thought couldn’t have been farther from the truth. Roark wheezed above me, like he couldn’t get a solid breath in. His tendrils twist-twist-twisted around my body, holding me safe and close. Like we were one giant being with three hearts beating the same panicked rhythm.

Encased inside him like this, I could hear his pulse.

Thump, thump, thump.Far too rapid to mean anything good.

Fumbling through the goo, I managed to push the button again. The lights came on, but Roark’s fear still clung heavy to my body—literally. He wouldn’t stop shaking. And his breathing was so loud I was certain someone all the way down the hallway would be able to hear it.

“It’s okay,” I urged, fighting with his body to try and turn around so I could hug him. “It’s okay, Roark.”

Seeming to understand that we were safe, Roark’s tendrils released enough to allow me to move. They didn’t let me go though, simply holding on—clinging to me like he was terrified I was about to disappear.

One look at his face and the pitch black of his spots made my stomach tangle in knots. His eyes were glassy, far away, like he wasn’t here with me at all.

“I’m so so sorry—” I had no idea why he’d freaked out like this. He had never been scared of the dark in our rooms. Though…now that I thought about it, hedidleave the galaxy ceiling on every night.

Huh.

Roark didn’t know what I was saying, but he responded to my tone anyway, melting into me, his head dropping to nuzzle into my hair as he continued to quake. The puff of his breath was even more obvious like this. And I spared only a single thought for the razor-sharp teeth I hoped he had control over right now—before I was wrapping my arms around what I could of his thick middle and comforting him.

“It’s okay,” I repeated, shushing him softly. I wished I could purr like he did when I was upset. It was kinda the most soothing thing ever. But I couldn’t. So I did the next best thing—humming quietly. His reaction to the sound made it obvious that I’d made the right choice. He sighed, melting into me even more as my chest vibrated and the silliest, most basic song in the world buzzed between us.

“Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” was a little on the nose.

But it was the first thing that popped into my head.

And it seemed to be working, so I continued to hum my way through the notes. Eventually, when the song ended, I started over from the beginning.

I’m not sure how long we stood there.

I’m not sure how long it took to get Roark’s breathing under control.

I wasn’t sure what he thought was happening, either. Or why he’d reacted the way he had. But I made a vow not to push anymore fucking buttons—curiosity be damned. I’d never seen him so off-kilter. And it hurt to know I was the reason he’d been scared.

His giant body towered over mine, blocking me from view of the rest of the hallway like a giant pink shield.

Several crewmates passed by us, all sharing worried glances, but none paused. A fact I was grateful for, as every time they glanced at their captain, I could literally feel how icy his body became.

“Shhh,” I murmured, stroking my hands up and down his sides. “It’s okay.” I reassured again, and that got him to relax.

Roark trembled for a long time.

---