Page 50 of Ryder

The night I took her virginity wasn’t just about that; I didn't even know at the time she was still a virgin. Our connection was like nothing else that night. She just gets me, and I get her. We may be worlds apart, but we connect on another level. One that I can’t even explain. Maybe I’m going fucking soft now, too.

“What if you’re wrong?”

He thumps me on the arm. “Do you have to be so fuckin’ negative?”

“I’m not negative,” I retort. “I’m a realist. I’m… I’m scared of havin’ nothin’ again. I’ve been down and out, and I never wanna go back to that.”

“And you won’t.” His eyes soften as he gives me a smile. “You’ve worked hard to get here, and it’s high time you start givin’ yourself some credit. If Crystal can’t see what’s inside you, then that’s her loss.”

I search his face for any signs of a joke, but he ain’t laughing. “I had no clue you were so in tune with your feminine side,” I laugh.

“Call it what you want, dick, but my momma always told me to go with my gut, and it’s never let me down yet.”

I chuckle. “Doesn’t your mom read tarot cards?”

“Yep, and she’s darn proud of it. She may have passed some of her woo-woo onto me, but I’ll gladly take that over bein’ an asshole like my dad.”

We’ve both had bad experiences with our fathers and suffered abuse. “Do you really think there’s a happy ever after for guys like us?”

“I think if we can get outta dodge from where we started and make a decent life for ourselves, then there’s hope for all of us.”

His phone chimes and he reads a text, then says, “Gotta run. Talk to Crystal.”

I feel dread in the pit of my stomach. I can’t believe she lied to me about this, too. Maybe she really does hate my guts because I didn’t fight for us. I didn’t even giveusa shot. That may be the one mistake I regret more than anything I’ve done in life this far. And fixing it? I don’t even know where to begin.

I smoke when I’m angry or nervous, and occasionally, when I’ve had too much to drink. This, however? This, I can’t even begin to put into words.

Crystal is tidying up the classroom. It’s long after the bell, but there she is, re-organizing her classroom like the good woman she is. The good woman who’s involved with a 1% biker who is not even a blip on her fucking radar.

I asked Jett — the club’s Treasurer, who also helps Harlem handle security — if he knew about Jimmy, and what he had to tell me was no picnic. The fuckhead, who goes byRifle,has a raptsheet as long as my arm. He’s also been in jail for aggravated assault, petty theft, breaking and entering, as well as selling narcotics. Surprise, surprise. He only did five years because the charges were dropped to possession.

How the fuck did my angel get caught up in this mess?

I lean against the door jam, my arms folded across my chest as she hums a little tune to herself.

Of course, she looks like a fucking dream in a cream floaty dress and wrap-around sandals. Her long, beautiful golden hair hanging down her back in soft waves.

She only grows more stunning as the years go on.

“You workin’ overtime?”

She jumps in the air at my voice, spinning around quickly toward the door. With a hand over her heart, her mouth wide, she takes a breath and waves her other hand at me. “Ryder! For fuck’s sake, you scared the shit out of me!”

“You should be a little more aware of your surroundin’s, Sugar. There are creeps everywhere in this city.”Namely one, and he sleeps in your bed.

She’s still calming her breath as she walks toward her desk at the front of the room. “So? What are you doing here? And how do you know where I work?”

I snort. “Please, like it was hard to find out. Since you’re not gonna be honest with me and Luca, then it’s clear we had to take matters into our own hands.”

“Sneaking up on people isn’t funny, and you can wipe that smirk off your face.”

“Neither is lyin’.”

She turns to face me, her eyes narrowing, her jaw set tight. “What are you going on about now? If you have something to say, Ryd, just say it.”

“Why don’t you ask yourboyfriend,or better still, one of his brothers at the Devils Ink MC what I’m goin’ on about?”

She stops in her tracks, her eyes dart to the blackboard, then she finds sudden interest in the floor. Her shoulders slump. “Oh.”