Page 39 of To Hell With It

I’d always hated anything to do with social gatherings, and nothing much had changed – unless I felt comfortable, like fish-and-chips Friday or quiz night. I didn’t have to actually participate, I let Una take the reins, but I enjoyed being there with her while she shouted out answers in a race against Carmel. The pair of them were in competition with each other. It wasn’t about Carmel, really, it was aboutShaun did everything but,although Una hated it when I told her that.

Sometimes I wondered if Una hated Carmel as much as she made out that she did or whether it was actuallyShaun did everything butthat she still hated for breaking her heart.

* * *

Mairéad sat down opposite me in my front room and sipped her coffee. I couldn’t stand the smell of it as much as I couldn’t stand the taste. To me, coffee smells like a dirty ashtray. I'd brought Mairéad into my front room because I thought it would help me break the news if I had a change of scenery.

I didn’t know what Mairéad would think of my plans to go to New Zealand. I hadn’t told her over the phone. I thought I’d squeeze in one last session before I left, and she’d been happy to come over once I told her I had something important to share.

‘I’m going on holiday,’ I said when we’d got the small talk out of the way and I knew she was listening.

‘Wow, that’s great, Pearl!’ She beamed. ‘Where are you going? When? With Una?’

‘No, on my own.’

‘My goodness, that is progress!’

‘I’m going to New Zealand,’ I said, and I watched the colour literally drain from Mairéad’s face.

‘New Zealand?’

‘Yep. On Thursday.’

‘You’re going to New Zealand on Thursday?’ She repeated the question like she thought I’d lost the plot.

‘Uh-huh.’

‘On your own?’

‘Yip,’ I said with a New Zealand twang.

‘OK.’ She paused. ‘And how did this come about?’

‘I want to see Jack again.’

‘Right, and does he know you’re coming?’

It was as if she already knew he didn’t.

‘I’m surprising him.’

‘Don’t you think it’s best he knows beforehand so he can prepare?’

Yes, I did, but I couldn’t tell Mairéad that because I didn’t want her to talk me out of it.

‘I think he’ll like the surprise. He wants to see me again and said he can’t wait. He said he’sall mine.’

‘He said that?’

‘In a note.’ I grinned. ‘He left it on my bed. And he texted me the other day saying I should come out.’

‘OK,’ she said again but I could tell that it wasn’t. ‘What about your OCD?’ she asked.

‘It’s coming with me.’

‘Very funny, Pearl, but how are you going to cope with it out there? The airport, the plane, the people?’

‘Rafts and rivers,’ I said breezily.

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