Page 144 of Savior

The room spins, and he grabs me.

His hands are a steady force on my shoulders—invariable.

“I’m sorry,” he says, pulling his hands back as if my skin burned him. “I wasn’t thinking.”

A pit burrows in my stomach as the water I drank mixes with the realization I have him so uncertain of how to behave in his own home.

Our home, he’d called it.

I can’t deal with that fact yet, either.

“It’s okay. Thank you. I drank some water, but I’m dizzy now.”

He eyes the glass I drained, and a smile breaks free. “That you did. You need more than water, though. I’ll get you more and a yogurt, maybe. Do you think you can stomach that?”

I nod, gripping the blankets beneath me as nausea swims in my stomach.

He’s back in a flash, helping me lean against the headboard of the bed and spoon-feeding me yogurt like I’m a sick child who can’t lift her plastic spoon. “I was worried that you wouldn’t come around.”

I swallow the third spoonful of yogurt, already feeling marginally better. “Were you worried you were going to have to drop me off at the institution?”

He sighs. “I didn’t want you to hear all that. It’s my fault. I got loud, and Ardesia matches energy.”

I fake a smile as he gives me some water.

“I would never do that to you, Sloane. You know that, right?”

Do I?

Searching his eyes for the truth, I feel a warm calm spreading through me as his steady, unwavering eyes peer back at me.

“I know.” My reply has his shoulders slumping in a release of tension.

“Good.”

Once the yogurt is gone, renewed energy spikes through me, and I drink the rest of the glass of water he hands me.

“I don’t know how to pick up the pieces,” I say to him, breaking a comfortable silence.

“I’m sure it feels daunting,” he says, leaning back in his chair. “What you endured is unfathomable to me. I don’t know that I’d have the strength to endure it. Even with my God to cling to. Sloane, I’m so sorry it took us so long to get you; I had to play by Ardesia’s rules.”

I swallow. “I understand. Everything he did to me wasn’t what bothered me most, if I’m honest. It was how I ca—” I close my lips, blush peppering my skin in bloodied tones.

Luca leans over, placing his hand near mine. “You can tell me anything. I will never judge nor tell another soul. If you don’t want to, that’s fine, too.”

Such an understanding, beautiful man.

I lick my lips, closing my eyes for strength. “There was a night Matteo came to me, he…” I swallow for strength. “He molested me. I was asleep. I thought… I was dreaming and….”

Luca’s hand covers mine in warm confidence, and I open my eyes.

“I came because I was dreaming of you. It’s why I think I lost it when I stabbed him. Not only did everything from my past spur me on, but he took away something meaningful. He ruined something for me.”

Sobs breaks free for the first time since Luca brought me home, and his eyes beam with hope, floating in them. My show of emotion is a step in the right direction.

“Little dove, it’s alright,” he tells me, getting on the bed and wrapping around me from behind.

“No, it’s not. He made me betray you. Not out here but in here…” I tap my head as I cry, snot and tears mixing on my face.