Page 17 of Hawk's Sapphire

“Maybe she’s in the shower.”I say to no one in particular.

“Shit.”Jake points to the screen.“Zoom in.”I do as he asks and that’s when I see it.

Sadie’s phone and her keys are on the island, where they should be if she’s home.But as I look further, I see what he’s looking at.Her desk is empty.All of her monitors, laptops, electronics she had on her make-shift office space, are gone.All the ways I use to track her are sitting in her home, withouther.The only other option I have left that might give me some answers is to check her camera system from the time I sent her away.

Guilt settles in the pit of my stomach.

I told her to fucking leave.

But I didn’t mean for real!I meant for her to go home and wait.

You think she’s going to wait there for someone who thinks she’s a traitor?

Shit.

We need to get to her house.Maybe I’ll find something there to give me a clue as to what she’s up to.”

Grabbing my keys, I lock up my room and head out to my bike.When I pick up my helmet, a yellow folded piece of paper falls out.

Nathaniel,

You don’t know the half of it.But when you figure it out,

I hope you’ll forgive me and understand.I had no other choice.

Yours Always,

Sapphire

7

SADIE

The ride from the private airport to the apartment, if you can even call it that, was relatively peaceful.After Vincenzo’s driver picked me up from my house, he took me directly to Matteo who was already waiting for me on his private jet.

Matteo tried to start small talk with me while his stewardess licked him with her eyeballs, but I wasn’t in the mood to talk.I know if I say anything about Hawk and the things he said, Matteo will just tell me what an insensitive, ignorant ass of a man Hawk is.

He’s not wrong.

But Hawk doesn’t have all the information.To him, everything I’ve done is self-serving and a betrayal to the club.He doesn’t have all the facts, and thanks to Vincenzo and Kayce, and all the shit we’re tied up in, I can’t tell Hawk jack shit.If I could just explain what I know, what I’m doing, he would still be pissed, but Hawk would get it.He would understand.

And he wouldn’t hate me.

Matteo tried for an hour to get me to open up, and when it felt like the tears were going to start up again and I was struggling to breathe, I told Matteo I was exhausted and asked him to show me to the bedroom in the back so I could sleep until we landed.

I spent the next two hours, curled in the fetal position, replaying every harsh word Hawk said to me at the clubhouse.Not just today, but every dig I could remember him talking about me not beingloyal enough to this club.

I went through every memory of him flirting, fucking, or dancing with a club whore or barfly he met.All the times he got caught fucking around in a public restroom with some random woman or strolled into the clubhouse half-awake after staying at a hotel with a hook-up for the night.I knew what he had been doing with them.All those other women.It was like sticking a hot poker in an already open wound and searing it.But it’s what I have to do to get myself over him.I have to remember who he really is, and why my dreams of becoming his ol’ lady are ridiculous and out of reach.

“It’s shit like this that makes it impossible for you to be mine.”Those were the words that finally broke me.

I never truly believed I would belong to Nathaniel.I had hoped and even dreamed from the time I was sixteen that he would see me as something more than a child to take care of, or an unwanted obligation.I did everything I could to prove to him I wasn’t a little girl anymore.To show him we had more in common than just the club we shared.

I took to learning about computers so we would have something in common, something to talk about.It worked for a little while.Or so I thought.We did have a common ground, and Hawk was all too happy to show me some of his tricks, and then I took to learning more than him.I started eating up every book, class, and dark web site I could learn from, and it finally happened.I bested him at his own game.And damn if it didn’t piss him the fuck off.

I broke into the school computer to help a friend who was being abused by changing her grades in the system so her father wouldn’t beat her for not being smart enough to pass.She wasn’t a bad student, but she struggled a lot.With shitty parents and no one to advocate for her to get help at school, I did the only thing I thought would help.Unfortunately, it cost me my life in Oakridge and landed my ass in a rich-prick-filled town and a snobby ass prep school.The best part of that whole situation was meeting Avery and bringing her home where she belongs.

Hell, at eighteen, I made my own tracking device, one that can be hidden in jewelry and clothing, so small it’s nearly untraceable to the untrained eye and looks like a common everyday accessory.No one, who didn’t know to look for it, would notice what it is.It’s perfect for children who don’t like certain textures on their skin or to wear bulky devices like watches or paracord bracelets.It’s even beneficial for Alzheimer patients and family members who suffer memory loss or other health issues that their family can’t always be with them but need reassurance of their whereabouts.

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