Page 68 of Hawk's Sapphire

“A package will arrive at your penthouse shortly with an invitation and instructions on where to bring the girl.Come alone.I’ll have your money waiting,” Cusenza explains.“And Matteo?”he adds.“If you need help finding a replacement, I’m sure I could be of assistance.Let me know the specifics you are looking for and I’ll have my curator locate the perfect woman for you.I won’t even charge you for her.We’ll call her a show of gratitude.A token of our new friendship.”

Matteo grunts, “I’ll be in touch,” then quickly hangs up the phone.

Vincenzo gives Matteo a curious look, then turns his icy glare on me.“You sure you still want to go through with this?”

“Absolutely.”This is exactly what we’ve been waiting for.An opportunity to get me into the compound and locate the other missing women and children.

“Over my dead fucking body!”Hawk shouts, squeezing my hand and pulling me into him.“You are not taking Sadie to that psycho bastard’s place tosell her.Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Mr.Hawkins, please don’t make suggestions you clearly don’t want followed,” Vincenzo says.“It’s counterproductive to the situation, and quite frankly, a waste of time.”

I pull out of Hawk’s grip and move toward Matteo.His hand rests on the small of my back, his subtle show of support.

“First of all, you don’t get to decide what I do.I’m a grown-ass woman and can speak for myself,” I shout back at the arrogant fuckhead.“Second, this is the whole point of the plan, Nathaniel.Getting into Cusenza’s compound on hisspeciallittle island has always been the end goal.We know it’s where he’s keeping the others, but no one has been able to penetrate his security or sneak in without getting killed.Using me as bait was always the plan.Now, shut the hell up and leave me alone.”

“Dolcezza.”There’s a hint of warning in Matteo’s tone.“Language.”

“He deserves it.And it will be well worth the punishment.Trust me.”

Vincenzo laughs from his seat across the table, shaking his head in amusement.“You think your ass can truly bear the brunt of Matteo’s punishment?Or are you simply trying to wind up Mr.Hawkins with the image of Matteo baring your ass and striping it with his belt for your use of explicit language?”

I shrug.“Neither sounds like a terrible thing to me,” I reply.“My ass could use a good, hard, spanking session, and Hawk deserves to think about how much I’ll be enjoying another man’s touch.Throughout all these years, he allowed me to drown in images of him and other women.”

Hawk can’t even deny it.

I pull away from Matteo and march my ass out of the room, not looking back to see if anyone is following me.All I care about is getting as far away from Hawk as possible.Once I’m in my room alone, I lock the door, sit on the edge of the bed, and do something I should’ve done a long time ago.

I call Avery.

Two rings and she answers, “Hello?”

“Hey Aves.”I reply, trying to keep the tightness out of my voice.

“Sadie?Oh my god!Sadie!Sadie, how are you?Whereare you?”Avery shoots off question after question in rapid fire.

The guilt of leaving my best friend behind while keeping so many secrets burns in the pit of my stomach.I’ve missed having someone to talk to and balance my craziness with her naivete.I’ve missed her.She’s still so innocent in so many ways.I want to say I am too, and compared to most of the guys, I guess I am.But the fact is, I’ve been exposed to so much lately—learned how the worldreally works—it’s hard not to feel like I’ll taint her with the truth.It wasn’t easy but cutting her off and leaving her behind was the right choice.It’s selfish of me to call her now, but I don’t know how to sort through what I’m feeling, and although I know the plans Vincenzo and Matteo have set in place, I know there’s still a high probability I won’t make it home again.

“Sadie?”

“Yeah, Aves.I’m here.”

“Answer me then, woman!Where are you?What the hell happened?And why the fuck didn’t you call me sooner?”she admonishes.

“Whoa!You’ve developed quite the colorful vocabulary since I left.”I try teasing to keep the mood light, but Avery’s not having it.Her tears and the cracking of her voice tell me I will not get away with my usual playful banter this time.

I’ve hurt her.

And it guts me.

“I’m sorry, babes.I did something, and I needed to get some space between me and the club for a little while until I can sort things out.”It’s not a total lie.I still don’t know what will happen between me and the club when everything is said and done.If I do make it out of this alive—will they forgive me and welcome me back home?Or am I always going to be deemed a traitor and left to navigate my life alone?

At least they won’t kill you for being a traitor.

“I heard you killed Nate.But I don’t believe it.I know you would never kill someone.Make their lives miserable and financially ruin them, absolutely, but not murder.You could never do that,” Avery whispers.

“I didn’t kill him, but Aves, I helped the people who did.I gave them access … but I didn’t do it for the reasons you might think.I’m not a cold-hearted killer.I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t believe it was the right thing to do.Nate knowingly helped kill Maggie and tried to kill you, too.He had a hand in my Uncle Jonah’s death as well.But the real reason I helped was because … I … I didn’t want Nathaniel to carry the guilt that would come with killing his own father.I know Nate was a low-life piece of shit and doesn’t deserve the title offatherany more than my own does, but Nathaniel’s mother still loves Nate.To have to face his mother, knowing he killed the man she still loved—he shouldn’t have to live with that kind of pain.So, I took the opportunity away.I know they all wanted vengeance for all the pain Nate caused, but I believe more than anything that peace and a clean conscience are more important.They may not believe it now—or ever really—but I did what I did for all of them.”

“Jesus, Sadie.Why don’t you just tell them that?Tell my dad.He’ll understand.”Avery is so sweet to believe that I’d be forgiven so easily, but I broke so many rules of the club.There’s no going back from that.They’ll never trust me again.