Page 17 of Offering Herself to Darkness

“Because as a Dark Kindred, you don’t have emotions,” she finished listlessly. “Though I have to admit, even without emotions, you’ve treated me nicer than my ex-fiancé ever did,” she added.

Xarex took a deep breath. Should he tell her that he was feeling? It was a shameful thing for a Dark Kindred to admit. Back on his home world, it would have gotten him terminated at once. But this might be a way of alleviating her emotional pain. If he could do that, the shame would be worth it.

“Nora,” he said, uncertain how to phrase it. “I have…something to confess to you.”

“You do?” She looked up at him with wide eyes. “What is it?”

Again, Xarex decided it was best to be direct.

“I have been feeling for some time,” he admitted heavily. “In fact, I believe that my emotion damper may be broken.” He reached back with one hand to feel the small damper at the base of his skull. “I know that I need to get it fixed but…having emotions intrigues me. Especially after I met you. I found I didn’t want to stop feeling so I have allowed it to stay in a state of disrepair.”

Nora’s eyes went even wider.

“I thought you seemed like you had feelings sometimes,” she said at last. “But I didn’t know—I thought all Dark Kindred were born without them.”

“Not true.” He shook his head. “We are simply implanted with emotion dampers that mute or cancel any feelings we might be having. But sometimes a damper will become faulty or non-functioning. I believe that is what happened to mine.” He touched the back of his neck again reflexively. “I was ashamed to admit it to you before—such an admission could have gotten me killed on my home world.”

“Really?” Her eyes got even wider.

“Really.” He nodded. “On the Dark Kindred home world there are special canine units called ‘sniffers’ who are deployed to smell out anyone having emotions. If a warrior is caught committing ‘feel-crime’ he is terminated immediately.”

“That’s awful!” she exclaimed. “I’m so sorry, Xarex—I had no idea.” She shook her head. “I should have tried to learn more about you and your people before we got married. I mean Joined.”

“You had too much on your mind already, worrying about Anna’s health,” he pointed out. “And speaking of her health, I’d like to try and help you get the Flower of Healing to save her.”

“So do you think you could really, uh, feel for me?” Nora asked uncertainly.

Xarex cupped her flushed cheek in one hand and looked intently into her eyes.

“Nora, I am already feeling for you,” he admitted in a low voice. “I have been for some time. At first it was just lust—your sweet scent nearly drove me wild even before I met you. But when I saw you and realized you were an Elite?—”

“An Elite?” She frowned uncertainly. “What’s that?

“A woman the Goddess had blessed with extra-generous curves.” Xarex let his eyes travel up and down her curvy body. “All Kindred love Elites.”

“But…you’re built like a professional athlete—you could have any woman you wanted. Are you really telling me you’d rather have a short, plus-sized girl like me than a supermodel?”

“Why would I want one of those skinny creatures?” Xarex asked, frowning. “They have no curves—nothing to hold on to or admire.” He let his eyes drift over her curvy body again. “Has no other man in your life ever appreciated your beautiful shape before?”

She shook her head.

“No. In fact, my ex-fiancé was always trying to get me to lose weight. And I tried—really I did. But then my sister died and I adopted Anna and…” She shook her head. “Let’s just say it’s been a lot and when I’m stressed, I tend to eat more than I should.”

Xarex frowned.

“You sound like you’re ashamed of your body. You shouldn’t be. Your beautiful curves combined with your enticing scent made me want you from the first.”

She bit her bottom him, clearly unsure how to answer this.

“Forgive me if I’m making you uncomfortable,” Xarex told her. “I’m just trying to tell you how I feel. Emotions are still difficult for me, as you know.”

“Yes, I know. Go on,” she murmured. “Uh, what else do you ‘feel’ for me?”

“Besides lust, I began to feel admiration when you told me about Anna and I saw your willingness to sacrifice yourself for her,” he admitted. “Such bravery in a female as small and petite as you are is extraordinary. Especially considering our size difference—I’m sure it must be frightening to think of submitting yourself sexually to one so much larger than yourself.”

Nora’s cheeks went pink and she shifted in his lap again.

“It made me a little nervous,” she admitted. “But I’m not really that brave. I just want to save Anna.”

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