Page 19 of Going Down Smooth: Part One

“I’m staying. I am not letting my—Christopher—sell my dad’s company,” I say finally. It feels wrong to call Christopher my father, but after what he said about me the other day, he doesn’t deserve my respect.

Freeya sucks in a sharp breath. “So, you’re going to do it then? Mate with them? I mean, look, you need to think this through, Mercy, you have three weeks to make a life changing decision. Are you sure about this?” I can hear her concern, and it makes my stomach twist in knots. I know Knight, Lox, Nate, and Trey would never hurt me. But it’s been five years. What do I really know about them now? Besides what I’ve gathered from internet stalking. Furthermore, I’m not the same girl who ran from them either. We need to talk, like now.

“OK, I’m coming. I can’t let you do this alone,” Freeya says, pulling me away from my wandering thoughts.

“Free, you don’t have to do that,” I reply with haste. The last thing I want is for her to uproot her life for me.

“I’m your best friend, and your assistant. I would assume I am going to have to relocate if we are about to take on a big-ass business venture like Smooth Bourbon. Or am I wrong?” Her words make me smile, just thinking about my father’s company and what it means to me gives me butterflies. She’s not wrong, I wouldn’t want to do it without her, or them. But would they want to, after all this time? They have their own lives now as well.

“OK.” I breathe, feeling a little excited about the business part of things anyway. And having Freeya here as well will put me further at ease.

“Plus, I need to see these men for myself. Give them the best friend stink eye. I will let you know when I land. We will figure this all out, boss lady. Bye.” She doesn’t give me a chance to respond, the phone disconnects abruptly. Knowing Free, she is pulling out suitcases, throwing her life into bags and calling a moving company to organize not only her stuff but my stuff to be moved here as well.

It feels rushed, but I made up my mind. Smooth Bourbon is mine. May as well let my assistant handle the logistics of moving my life back to Frankfort. I stare down at the phone as if it has the answers to the meaning of life, until the sound of voices finally filter up to me from somewhere in the house.

I climb out of the bed and suddenly feel exposed. Even after everything we did these past few days, I still feel as if this is the first time they are actually seeing me. New Mercy. I am nervous, maybe even a little scared. Not wanting to let my insecurities get the better of me, I roll back my shoulders and leave the room with as much confidence as I can muster.Face it till you make it, Mercy.

* * *

The third floor has a large bedroom at the end of the hall, with the largest bed I’ve ever seen taking center stage. The beautiful four-poster bed appears hand carved, untouched. There’s cream and black pillows neatly arranged on top of cream quilted bedding. The walls in this room are painted a soft grey color with white crown molding, a nice contrast to the wooden interior walls throughout the rest of the house. Plush cream and black rugs strategically line the floors, with ebony furnishings, comfy black wingback chairs sit in front of a large fireplace. Leaning in, I spy a large empty walk-in closet, big enough to be a room itself, and yeah, I may be imaging filling those drawers and rails with all my things.

I mean, I am doing this, right?Beyond the room are two glass doors, leading to a patio overlooking the forest below. It’s clean and tidy, in fact, the entire room looks like a museum or maybe a shrine. None of the guys’ scents permeate the room, so no one sleeps here, but this is the main bedroom. I stand in the doorway, almost feeling like an intruder. The door is open, and my curiosity gets the better of me. Instead of heading downstairs in search of the guys, my feet carry me into the room. I should back away, it feels too personal, like the lack of life in this room alone tells the story of an absence I’m not sure I can fill. At least not yet.

I sigh and take slow steps away from the room longingly, wishing I could claim it as mine. This room should be mine.Ours. My thoughts are a jumbled mess of contradictions. I know if I want my inheritance, this is the way: mate my pack like I was supposed to five years ago. There, life settled, no worries, continuing my father’s legacy. It’s not like this is a hardship. After all, I never stopped caring for them, never stopped lo— Well, I don’t know if I am ready to form those three words in my head yet, but in time, of course.

Nothing is stopping me, the world is waiting, Mercy Smooth. There is part of me that yearns to dive onto the middle of the bed and roll around in the sheets, marking it with my scent.Mine.But then, there’s my fear, creeping in like black slow-moving sludge, drowning out the pros of my father’s silver platter arrangement. It whispers I’m being manipulated, telling me my so-called pack wants to use me, take control, own me. They hate me, I rejected them. How could they want me after what I did to them? No, they want to cut me off at the knees, bind me to this home, a figure head where they make all the decisions. I’m nothing but an Omega to be used repeatedly.

I stand in the middle of the hallway, arms wrapped around my middle. Barely holding myself up against the barrage of doubts and negativity that threatens to swallow me whole. Then I hear a loud bark of laughter. Nate. Followed by another. Trey. Then, a deep rumbled curse from Knight. I smile, a light breaking through my chasm of darkness, my worries begin to recede. Despite my dithering back and forth, I realize they haven’t given me any reason to fear what may or may not happen. I have two choices, drown in the sudden change in my life, allow it to drag me under into the pit of despair. Or I can swim in the safe waters of Pack Biggs and trust that they will be the safety net they have always been, and flourish. I can make this work. I refuse to lose it all because I can’t get out of my own way. I let their presence anchor me in the now and I make my feet move, one in front of the other.

Making my way downstairs, I stop to admire every detail. The three-story cabin in the woods is built to absolute perfection. I’m jealous. I won’t admit it to the guys, but I even took a sniff of the polished wooden walls. Nothing like that freshly cut wood smell. I take a deep breath and the scent still lingers, merging magnificently with the scents of caramel, hot chocolate and marshmallows, crisp apples, fire, and wood smoke. A heady cocktail of a campfire under the stars: of home.

Nate designed this place to be practical, hence the wooden cabin in the woods feel. But there is a subtle elegance to this home, in the form of plush furniture, perfect for naps and book reading, understated, thought-out curated spaces that makes me want to stop and admire every room I pass. This is a home for four Alphas who adore the outdoors and enjoy their privacy. This place is refreshing and cozy, with touches of all four of them dotted all around the place.

Finally, I make it to the ground floor, my bare feet slap across the hardwood floor as I follow my nose. The combination of their scents together is intoxicating. I feel like a bloodhound; their scents get stronger as I get closer.

“Tell her today, Knight. There can be no lies between us. She doesn’t need to feel she is with us out of obligation to hold onto her father’s company. She deserves the truth,” I hear Trey say, his voice raised as if they’ve come to the end of a heated debate.

“We’re on shaky ground as it is. We need to be transparent in our intentions here. I can’t lose her again,” Nate chimes in softly, blowing out a breath from somewhere in the room ahead of me.

I pause in the hall, hearing the clanking of pots and pans, the delicious smell of cooking making my stomach rumble. Not wanting to appear as if I am eavesdropping, although I am damn curious about their conversation, I interrupt them as I walk straight into the kitchen not missing a beat.

“I will—" Knight stops mid-sentence and watches me, eyes roaming up and down my body, making me put a little extra sway in my hips. Lox turns his attention to me as well and my cheeks heat with the memory of our morning. Is it wrong to want him, to want them again so soon? I mean, I think my vagina and I are going to have to have a conversation, apparently my brain didn’t get the off-limits memo, ignoring the lingering soreness that came with my heat.

“You hungry, Mouse?” Lox asks as he turns his attention back to the industrial size stove across the room. Nate stands beside him, chopping something in front of him, while Trey and Knight stand on opposite sides of a large island in the middle of the room. Almost as if they were facing off.Interesting.Now I really want to know what is going on. I guess I will get right to it then.

“I can get used to this,” I tease, making Trey smile as I walk further into the massive open planned kitchen and dining area. Large windows make up one side of the kitchen wall, bathing the room in bright sunlight. The arched ceiling makes the room almost feel cavernous with large log beams which join at the center, forming a triangular shape. A long island sits in the middle of the kitchen, stools lining one end to create another place to eat and congregate, with four oversized spotlights hanging overhead. Wooden cabinets, black marble counters and modern appliances litter the space, the perfect marriage of rustic and modern. A family-sized oval table makes up the dining portion of the room, allowing you to look out onto the front yard of the house and into a meadow of wildflowers. The wind has picked up outside making the flowers sway gently on the breeze. Tranquil and beautiful.

I gesture with my hands, indicating the view outside as I cross the room towards the table. “I mean, look at this view.” I smile as I pull out a chair, all too mindful I am not appropriately dressed, still wearing Knight’s t-shirt that falls almost to my knees. I mean, it’s practically a dress, and I have nothing to hide that they haven’t already seen. I sit, tucking the shirt underneath my thighs and prop my head in my hands, watching them work, or rather watching them watch me. The heated stares of four set of eyes on me is doing all kinds of things to a girl’s libido.Down, girl.

Knight clears his throat. “How are you feeling?” he asks tentatively, as if I am going to suddenly turn into Mr. Hyde and go apeshit at random. I arch a brow, wondering why he seems so hesitant but decide against it, choosing to answer him instead.

“Well, my heat is over. I’m OK. Sore. But OK,” I say as if I am giving a status report. It all feels too clinical.

Trey frowns at Knight and I assume he thinks the same thing. With a huff of annoyance, he leaves the island and saunters over toward me, looking deliciously dapper in his flat cap and black rimmed glasses. The quintessential chap, wearing a black and white plaid shirt and blue jeans with suspenders attached. I can’t take my eyes off him. Admiring how strikingly handsome he is, his brilliant smile captivates me, his scent makes me yearn for colder nights under a cozy blanket with his arms wrapped around me. In this moment I forget what my life was like all the years I’ve been away from Trey, away from Knight, Nate, and Lox. All I want is to say yes, I am yours and you are mine forever. My mates. Mine. Trey’s lean body towers over me, breaking my chain of thought as he pulls me out of my seat, making me shriek in surprise.

“Trey!” I shout as he picks me up and sits me in his lap. Wrapping his arms around my waist his chin rests on my shoulder as he takes a deep breath, inhaling my scent. “You smell amazing, Songbird.”

“Yes, she does,” Nate says as he brings a stack of plates to the table. When he reaches us, he sets the plates down and leans in to kiss me on the cheek, and I relax further into Trey’s hold. When I said I can get used to this, I meant all of this. The easy way they move about this room, this house, me. It’s like time stopped and we are right back to where we were five years ago, well, three out of four isn’t bad, I guess. Knight seems to be holding himself back. Of all of them, he is the hardest to read.

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