Page 13 of Demon's Angel

But I’ve nothing to tell. I don’t know where Theo is. That’s the bargain I’d made. No information given in either direction.

If I’m going to die, I’d rather do it painlessly.

Seeing Demon the other morning had brought back happier memories. Oh, I know I used to annoy him and Nathan; I’d been so irritating, telling them Mom had said they had to let me play with them. That squirrel Hellfire had mentioned? That was one of those times. I shouldn’t even have been there. The memory brings a fleeting smile to my face.

I’d looked up to my big brother, but even more, had revered his handsome friend. I’d even boasted at school he was my boyfriend, back when I’d been five and him fifteen. It wasn’t until I reached puberty that I knew what it was to wish that could be reality. Oh, how I plagued him when Nathan was at home on leave. I’d been sixteen the year we lost my brother. My cheeks redden as my thoughts make me blush. Demon was twenty-six, and embarrassed when I’d dressed up when he’d come over, at my early attempts to put on makeup, and oh, my vain endeavours to flirt. Looking back now, I can see how I’d made him uncomfortable. Back then, my only desire had been to steal a kiss.

I hadn’t been successful.

I’d left, gone to college, after that moved to New York. Lost my virginity to someone with long, almost-black hair and dark eyes, and looking back, every boyfriend thereafter was a Demon stand-in. Would I have been able to handle the real thing? Hell, no. As today has shown, he might be an attractive package, but what’s inside is rotten to the core. I hadn’t missed the inherent violence that he seemed to only just be holding back.

This Demon no longer attracts me. If I cared enough, I’d be scared.

Theo.No. Don’t go there. Don’t think about him anymore. A silent prayer for his safety, that will have to be enough. Jeez! Suddenly it hits me. I’d been so deep in my misery, I hadn’t asked the obvious.How does Demon know what I’d done? How does he know I handed Theo over?For a second, I worry he might have upset all my plans. But it’s me he brought here, not Theo.Please, let Theo be gone, where neither I nor anyone else will ever be able to find him.

A sob starts to rise; I push it back down. To keep my mind occupied, words come out of my mouth. “Aren’t you bored?”

My sudden question takes Mace by surprise, and he needs a moment to answer. His eyes flick first to the other man, then back to me. “Bored? No.”

“You’re not curious, either?”

“Nah. What reasons you had for what you did are between you and Demon. No concern of mine.”

“No thoughts? You’re not going to berate me?”

His head tilts as he thinks about it. “I reckon you’re going to get what you deserve.”

Maybe I won’t need to kill myself. Maybe Demon will do it for me. Do I want to know? While I’m wondering what question to formulate next, Mace turns his back.Conversation over.

His companion? One look shows it’s not worth wasting my words.

I swear this building’s making noises, subtle creaks and groans, but otherwise, down here, no sound reaches us. If half the rumours about the Satan’s Devils are true and my suspicions correct about what the basement is used for, I expect it will be soundproofed. Time’s dragging. Whatever will happen, I just want to get it over with. I’m starting to wonder whether it’s possible to die just from the pain I’m feeling inside. All my life’s been about loss, my brother, father, and then my mom’s living death. Theo was mine, a life dependent on me. A living, breathing creature who carried part of my soul as well as my blood. As he grew I knew I’d see Nathan in him, Dad as well, even my mother. Wrapped in an exterior that would be unique to him too. I’d never blame him for his existence; both he and I were innocent in that. His start to life never for one minute made me love him less.

The door opening makes me jump. I didn’t even hear footsteps.

Demon enters alone, pulling the door shut behind him. “You can leave us, Mace, Thunder.”

I watch, wondering whether they can sense the danger in the air, the threat that violence may well be done. Would they be worried about leaving me alone with Demon? But if either of the two men have such concerns, they don’t show them. Mace leads the way to the closed door and opens it again.

In the brief moment the heavy wood is held open, sounds reach us from up above. Music playing, voices talking. Laughter, and the unexpected wail of a hungry baby. A cry I know well, and which has its normal affect, amplified as it’s been so long since I last fed him. My breasts swell, my nipples leak, and the front of my shirt dampens.

I stand so fast the chair topples over. “Theo. How? Why? What?” Then realising the questions don’t matter, torn between being beyond grateful I’ve been given another chance and the hopelessness that my hurriedly thought out and executed plan had failed, I’m rushing toward the door, but come up against an immovable force.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“To feed Theo. He’s hungry. He needs me.”

“Fuckin’ shame you didn’t think about that earlier.”

I slap at him; he takes hold of my wrists. I kick at his legs, it’s like kicking tree trunks. It’s only when I raise my knee that he moves back, somehow swings me around until my back is to his front. Then he hisses menacingly into my ear, “Calm the fuck down. We’re going to talk. Once we’ve done that, I’ll decide whether you are ever going to see your son again.”

The door might have closed, meaning I can no longer hear my son’s hungry cries, but the echo is going around my head. “He needs me,” I repeat. “I have to go to him.”

“He doesn’t need you. Just needs someone who’ll take care of him, and he’s got exactly that. You didn’t care who’d be looking after him earlier, did you?”

“I cared. You have no idea how fucking much,” I shout, knowing I’m sounding unreasonable. “What do you mean he’s got someone to look after him? Who’s got him?”

“One of the ol’ ladies.”