Page 98 of Devil's Due

I realise that everything’s been a blur since I arrived, I haven’t had the chance to speak with Paladin before, or not in any depth. I admire him for taking the opportunities offered by moving to a new place, settling into a new family. I’m genuinely happy for him, but can’t see myself doing that, I’m longing for the men I’ve called brothers for years, the familiar rather than the new. I’m too old to change. Unlike Pal who still has a chance to find his place in the world, I already have mine, and it’s not here in Pueblo.

Though I think he’s got something right. I suspect wherever Stevie is, I’d be happy.

Max, getting restless, wanders off once again. Pal’s eyes follow him. “Any news on your woman?”

I bite back my reply I’d not be idly standing here if I knew where to find her and try to summon up a polite reply. “Zilch. Cad’s working with Mouse who’s pulling in favours from Cara, but the marshals know how to hide their shit deep. Drummer’s still trying to trace Devil who’s gone underground.”

“And there’s been no word back from the Wretched Soulz?”

“Nah. Driving me fuckin’ crazy if you want to know.”

Pal’s eyes crease in sympathy. “When Jay disappeared, I went out of my mind and that was only for hours. It’s been a week for you now, Beef. I can’t begin to imagine how you’re feeling.”

“Just putting one foot in front of the other and keep breathing air into my lungs. I feel so fuckin’ helpless, that’s what’s worst.”

He makes no verbal reply, but I feel the slap of his hand against the leather of my cut. The simple gesture of sympathy and support, letting me know he’ll be there for me no matter what. Not for the first time I wonder how I could tolerate a situation such as this without knowing I had such men at my back. The knowledge I’m not alone is what keeps me moving forward.

Another church, the second since Stevie vanished. Ten days gone by and we’re no further forward. Negative reports all around. For want of something to say that doesn’t attract answers of no news, or how the fuck should I know, I bring up the ideas I’ve had while taking Max outside to do the necessary. A task I need to do so often, the state of the area has been playing on my mind.

“You know you could turn the yard into something attractive?” I start when Demon asks whether there’s any other business. Seeing I’ve got their attention, I lay out the ideas I’d thought about the other afternoon.

“Yard’s been that way since we moved into the place,” Rusty grumbles, jerking his chin toward Bomber and Hellfire, the original members.

“Rather like the rustic feel,” Pyro observes.

“Rustic? Construction site more like.” Ink sounds like he could be brought over to my side.

“Pussies from Tucson probably want a swimming pool dug out as well.”

Lizard’s eyes gleam at Mace’s complaint. “Now you’re talking!”

“Vi’s always worrying about Theo when he comes to the club. He’ll soon be crawling. I’m up for the idea.”

I raise my chin toward Prez. Two coming around to my way of thinking.

“How much is this gonna cost, Beef?” A not unexpected question from the treasurer.

I supply the answer, “Less than you’d think. If we do the labour. Just the cost of hiring equipment for a couple of days and the turf.”

“I’m game. As long as Skull’s woman bakes some of those muffins and cookies to keep us fed.” Mace grins.

“Get the prospects to do it,” Thunder growls, seeming unimpressed by the enforcer’s reference to Melissa’s cooking skills.

“We’ll all pitch in,” Demon states firmly. “Bout time we did something about tidying up the outside. Add in fencing to go around the furnace. Don’t want any dogs or kids falling inside.” His pointed look toward me states volumes.Or blind women.

It’s something I can put my back into. Sorting out what we need, getting people organised, having to draw up a rotation from the large number of volunteers who seem more like a pack of kids wanting to take their turn with the new toy, the digger when it’s delivered, keeps me occupied. It doesn’t take my mind totally off Stevie, but at least helps me get through the day. With everyone doing their bit—even the club girls getting involved with Titsy who shows she’s got green fingers and demanding we leave part un-turfed so she can start a vegetable and flower patch—the work proceeds at a good pace. By Sunday evening the yard has been transformed. The ground has been cleared and flattened, and Kentucky Bluegrass has been laid. Just as we finish there’s a rainstorm which means nature’s taken care of watering it in.

Standing inside looking out of the kitchen window, Demon slaps my back. “Will you look at that? Transformed the fuckin’ place. Let’s have a family barbeque next weekend, put it to some use.”

Like the rain drenching the newly laid grass, his words have a similar effect on my pride in the fruition of my idea. What good is a family event when you’ve no one to share it with?

“We’ll find her,” Demon states softly, but with determination. “It’s only a matter of time, Beef.”

The new grass barely has time to settle before it starts getting covered with loungers which, in turn, bear almost naked bodies of the club girls, and only slightly more decently attired old ladies. Jay, Melissa and Violet adorn themselves with bikinis, much to the ire of Demon, Pal and Skull while Mo, Jeannie and Sindy make do with more discreet swimsuits. Cad, strangely, as he’s so pale it wouldn’t be expected he’d spend much time outside, seems very taken by the new greenery, and takes it on himself to direct the prospects to move the furniture each night to avoid browning the new grass. For everyone else, the mood is cheery, and expectations of the barbeque, which is approaching fast, are high.

While Violet’s overjoyed she can sit Theo on a blanket outside and is currently helping him throw a ball for Max—well, roll it along the ground really as he can’t run too fast or jump yet—the preparations just serve to remind me that my woman isn’t here.

Hellfire wanders over and passes me a beer. In order to stop him asking how I’m doing, which seems to be everyone’s opening gambit now, I get in first.