Page 46 of Amy's Santa

“No pressure,” he reminds me, pulling me close, hesitating to open the door. “Whatever you need, babe. What I’d really like to do, what I’ve been thinking of all evening, is feeling those lips again. Is that alright with you?”

God, yes. Especially when I’d been scared knowing what happened would indeed push him away. The fact that it hasn’t is a relief. What I hadn’t realised is the knowledge there are now no secrets between us, that he knows the worst and has stayed, is freeing. I’d felt used and dirty, but Drew now made me feel clean. Part of the power Flint has held over me for the past three months drifts away. Flint’s in the past, and this man I’ve desired forever is my future.

He’s waiting.

“Yes.” My permission is gasped and breathy.

Then he lowers his mouth to mine, slowly, deliberately.

The taste I’m still learning is tinged with whisky and beer, but I know, like me, he’s perfectly sober, both of us staying so, intentionally. His touch, so gentle, his tongue dancing with mine. I shiver again, but it’s not from the cold, nor caused by my nerves which are receding, memories of that awful night lessening their grip on me as I hold on to dear life for the man who’s always been kind, and apart from the once, has never done anything to hurt me. Instead of no, I begin to ask, can I? Could I allow my fantasy to come true? Could I let Drew make love to me?

Eventually he pulls back from me and leans his forehead against mine. “Slow as you need or nothing at all, okay?”

I nod. He opens the main door and I get my first look at the place Drew calls home. Both interior doors are open, bedroom furniture is in one, and the other has been turned into a sitting room, just how I remember Peg’s back in the day. It’s the room containing a large king-sized bed which Drew guides me into, his hands resting on my shoulders.

Something catches my eye. “Hey, where did that come from?” My eyes narrow as I spy my suitcase by the side of the bed.

“Got a prospect to bring your shit down. You don’t need to go back to that suite. Your place is with me, Amy, whenever you’re on my compound.”

I’m slightly annoyed he’s telling not asking, but why should I object, when deep down it’s what I want. I don’t want to sleep alone, and I’d prefer not to be where I’d remember Xander sharing my bed, and how I disappointed him.

“I go back to Phoenix tomorrow,” I remind him, the idea not attractive in the least. “I’ve a shift tomorrow night. I was lucky to get these three days off.” I only managed it by getting my request in early.

He sighs deeply. “I know, Amy. Believe me, I fuckin’ know. I spoke to Nathan, he’ll be driving back with you and staying in your apartment. You won’t have to go anywhere alone.”

“Are you sure you can spare a prospect?” It’s lucky I’ve a two-bedroom place.

“Not letting you go, otherwise. I want, need you to feel safe, babe. Now why don’t you use the bathroom first?”

I nod, nervous again.First.I know he means before him, but it also signifies it’s before I get into his bed.

I enter the en suite, do the necessary, clean my teeth, then eye my bag I’d brought in with me. I’ve a t-shirt and shorts that I sleep in. Making a quick decision, I slip them on. There’s no way I’m going to walk back into the bedroom naked. I shake my head at my reflection in the mirror. I’m the girl who doesn’t mind walking around completely unclothed in a BDSM club, but I’m scared stiff of letting Drew see me. How fucked up is that?

“Babe?” Drew calls out, a reminder he’s waiting for me.

“Coming.”

I nod at the woman staring back at me, then, taking a deep breath, open the bedroom door…

Drew hasn’t got the same nerves as me. He’s already undressed, lying naked on top of the covers. I stare, grin, and then let out a loud laugh as I see what he’s using to maintain his modesty.

“It’s Christmas.” He shrugs when he sees where I’m looking.

Then my mirth fades. I’d often seen Drew dressed only in a swimsuit when we’d played around in the pool, cooling off in the scorching heat of summer. But I haven’t seen his bare chest for years. He’s changed, grown into the body of a real man. Christ, I knew he had muscles, I’ve felt them as he’s held me, but he’s bulked up and has a well-defined six pack leading down to that mouth-watering V. He’s got tattoos almost covering the whole of his chest, on his back, while I can’t see, I’m certain he’ll have a replica of the Satan’s Devils colours.

He’s the most magnificent specimen of a man that I’ve ever seen.

Then I’m laughing again. Full belly laughs which have me bent double.

“What?”

I point out a finger that’s quivering, not with fear, but as a result of my amusement. “It’s moving!”

“Well, looking at you eating me with your eyes, seeing you in those tiny shorts. That’s what you do to me.” He looks down too, and chuckles.

The Santa hat covering his cock is slowly rising. My God, he’s making hormones go wild as I get an idea of what he’s packing. If only I can summon up the guts to go through with this, I’m going to be one lucky woman tonight.

It’s then I realise I’ve made my decision. Drew, making me laugh, making me promises he’ll never hurt me. Suddenly the remaining power Flint has over me starts to fade. A burst of rage goes through me, chasing the remainder away. Why let him ruin this? What I’ve wanted since I became a woman?No, I tell myself with determination.I won’t allow thoughts of him to intrude.It’s only Drew and me here. Drew, the man of my dreams.

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