Page 18 of Hawk's Cry

“Money’s going into your account whether you want it or not. Look at it as a loan if you don’t want to accept what you’re owed. Me? I think you should take it. Dad’s right. He gave me a start in life, seems like he ought to treat both his sons equally.”

Zane’s made a good point. But I can see arguments ahead as I try to get Eli to spend it. Maybe he will. When he gets fed up with eating ramen noodles that is, which is probably what we’ll be down to once the food in the pantry run out.

“I’ll see you out.” I stand, while Eli makes no effort to rise.

On the doorstep Zane leans in, speaking quietly so Eli can’t hear him. “I’m fuckin’ worried about him, Ollie, and about you and the kid. I… well, he’s acting completely out of character. I never imagined he’d do what he’s done, or be like this.”

I try to reassure him, or am I reassuring myself? “He’ll be better once he’s physically well again. You know how he gets Zane, when he can’t do the things that he wants. Remember when he fell out of that tree and broke his wrist? He was like a hornet whose nest had been poked until he could use it again.”

Fleetingly, a grin crosses his face. “Yeah, I remember.” Then he grows serious. “Christ, Olivia. I just hate this. I feel part of me has been ripped away. It’s not just him, it’s you and the baby.”

“We’re still here. You’re welcome anytime, Zane.” I truly mean it. He’s got no beef with Eli as he’s not a club member. He’s family, and I need someone on my side.

“What are you two whispering about?” Eli’s annoyed voice sounds from behind me.

I give Zane an apologetic look, but the expression he gives back to me is annoyed. “If you need someone to talk to, Liv, call me. Okay? You need help with anything, I’ll be here right away.”

As I wrap my arms around him, I nod my head, acknowledging his offer, but hoping I don’t need it.

“Tell Mom and Sam I’ll come to see them soon.”

“You better,” he warns me. “They might have lost him, but you’re still part of the family, Olivia.”

Chapter Seven

Drummer…

The loud clearing of a throat interrupts me. I stand, reach out for a cloth and wipe oil off my hands. I’ve been doing some maintenance on Sam’s Vincent Black Shadow which we’ve managed to keep going over the years. Christ, is it really more than twenty-six years ago I first saw her broken down by the side of the road? Some days the memory’s so fresh it seems like just yesterday.

She’d changed me that day. I’d been a single man one year off my forties, had no intention of making anyone mine, but she’d stepped into my life and stayed as my old lady.

I’ve never had one moment of regret, until now. Until I hear her quietly weeping in our bed at night, and I’m unable to comfort her. I feel so fucking guilty that she’s estranged from her oldest son. Had I really missed the signs and forced him into something he didn’t feel for the same way as me? Had I seen a boy I could shape, not a son who had hopes and dreams of his own?

A second soft cough reminds me I’m not alone. I glance over my shoulder, raising my chin when I see who it is. “Prez.”

“How’s he doing?”

“How the fuck should I know?” I snarl. Wizard knows the score. Eli’s turned his back on the club. I, and the club, need time. A hell of a lot of water has got to flow under the bridge before things can start to settle down. Will I ever have a relationship with my son again? Right now, I don’t know. Maybe we’ll never be able to reconcile our differences, our views on life so far apart.

Wizard just stands, arms folded, a smirk on his face and a raised eyebrow.

I take in a deep breath and let it out angrily. “Okay, so I sent Zane around.”

Looking behind him, Wizard sees there’s a bench the right height. He moves back a few inches and cocks his hip against it. “And?”

I throw the dirty cloth down. “He’s pretty badly beaten.”

Wizard huffs a laugh. “Not news, Drum.”

I know it’s not. Grimacing, I add, “Zane couldn’t get a read on him. He thinks it might be because he’s hurting, but what is clear, he’s left without making any plans.”

“That doesn’t sound like Eli.” Prez frowns. “But we did force the issue, maybe he was waiting until a better time, once he’d got a job and place to live lined up.”

That’s the thought that’s been going around and around my mind. “See, that’s what I don’t understand. It’s why we all voted him in as VP. He never took a step unless he had a direction to head in. He’d been thinking about leaving the club for a while, yet hadn’t put anything in place. You must have noticed he wasn’t quite with us for the last few months.” I glance at him to see him grimace. We all had, but just thought he needed space to get his head around whatever was bothering him. “I think we all were ignoring it. All of us, except for his best friend. It would have come to this whether or not Throttle had confronted him.” I go to the fridge I keep in my garage and take out a couple of beers. Opening them, I pass one to Wizard. “Something tells me he’d not have been better prepared even with more time. He was focused on getting away from the club, not about what he’d do once he achieved that objective. Else, at some point over those months, he’d have had options lined up.”

“The old Eli would have,” Wizard agrees. He takes a drink, then muses, “It started after the wedding.”

I shake my head. “Possibly even before that. When Olivia found out she was pregnant, and he knew he’d have to step up and be a family man.”

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