Page 112 of Avenging Devil: Part 2

Chapter Thirty

Saffie

Isuppose it could be third time lucky, but how on earth, after the disasters in my life, could I have even dreamed of meeting a man like Niran, let alone ended up with him?

He hasn’t taken from me. He hasn’t pushed me. He’d waited patiently until I was ready. Until I believed that sex wasn’t the end-all be-all. It was an addition to our relationship, a physical extension of what we feel for each other.

My love for him has been growing each day, the realisation I was ready to make the admission culminating as he threw my father’s suggestion of money back in his face. I was so glad he did.

While I’d only recently learned that a son of mine would inherit, I’d immediately baulked at the idea of how much responsibility that would be on a child, especially as my suspicions have been confirmed that my family’s business is partly, at least, not made from honest endeavours.

I lie with my face against his chest, feeling the beating of his strong heart. He’s claimed me but has also given me himself. Clive was supposed to be mine, but he’d shown no reciprocal commitment. As for Duke, the thought that I had any equal ownership over him was laughable.

Niran’s admission I had the power to break him if I were to leave is exactly the way I feel about him. As an old lady, I’m property in his brothers’ eyes, but for once, that word doesn’t hurt, doesn’t suffocate, and isn’t anything I want to run from. I want to be his, as much as he wants to be mine. If I’m his property, then I’m equally possessive about him.

Not that I think he would stray. How would he when he’s waited so patiently for me to be ready? Even when I’d been pushing him away, he was always there waiting in the wings.

“You okay?” His voice rumbles under my cheek.

“More than okay.”

He taps my back. “I’ve got to deal with the condom.”

Reluctantly, I ease myself away. When he sits and removes the very necessary item, knotting the end, to save him from having to move, I take it from him. Going into the bathroom. I flush it away, relishing how easy things are between us. There’s no embarrassment over the tiniest of things.

When I return to the bedroom, I can see he’s fallen asleep. I smile at his sleeping form, acknowledging how vulnerable a man looks at rest.

It’s been a long day. I, too, feel drained, but am still too hyped up. Instead of returning to the bed, I sit on the chair with my head propped on my hand, watching my man sleep.

I’m disappointed Duke didn’t turn up and wonder why he didn’t. Had he not known? Or am I no longer important to him? Without knowing, I’ll never fully be able to move on. As long as Duke’s alive, I’ll never be totally free of him. I’m still married for a start. Niran and I would be happy living in sin, but he wants to marry me, and I’d proudly wear his ring on my finger. A sign to even civilians that I belong to him.

The thought reminds me of my parents. Why am I not distraught over my father’s diagnosis? I suppose I was pre-warned, Duke having already told me. The little girl inside is upset at the thought of losing one of the first influences in her life, but the woman I’ve become wonders how much he knew and when he knew it about my relationship with Duke, and why he hadn’t done more to save me? I tend to think his business with the Crazy Wolves was more important than my happiness and well-being.

As they hadn’t been able to have another child, their legacy would only continue if I gave birth. That’s my only value to them.

As a child you don’t think too much about how you were brought up. Things that might be out of the norm for other people seem natural for you. It’s only with an adult’s hindsight, you look back and realise perhaps things weren’t how they were meant to be. Looking back, I seldom spent time with either of my parents.

But I’d loved them, hadn’t I?

Now Dad is dying. Do I care? Of course I do. I’d not wish death on anyone—with the exception of Duke. But am I beating myself up about the time we’ve spent apart? No, I’m not. Dad had known where to find me, he just hadn’t bothered to launch a rescue.

Will I miss him when he’s gone? I will. But more because he’s a man not there anymore, and not like losing a dad. Do I wish him to go through pain and suffering? No, I do not. His only crime was not caring.

My mind circles back to Duke.

I’d started the day wound up on adrenaline, scared as hell Duke would turn up, but excited too. My fears were for the men protecting me, but my elation was for myself. I was going to be free. Now I’ve come down to earth with a bump and regretting that Duke lives to darken another day.

But his chains on me have been loosened, as evidenced by what had just taken place with Niran. I smile to myself, shifting to ease some of the delicious ache that I’m feeling.

It’s the first time a man’s allowed me to be in charge. I don’t think I could have done it any other way. Not for the first time at least. It might have been expediency on Niran’s part, but I don’t believe that was all. He’d given me what I needed. And I’ve certainly no regrets, how could I? I’ve just had the best sex of my life.

Unable to stop myself yawning, I realise I’m tired at last. When I slide under the sheet next to my man, his arm comes around me, as though even in sleep he was waiting for me. I snuggle against him, my last thought before closing my eyes is that in the morning, I want a repeat. Just to check my amazing orgasms weren’t flukes, of course.

Smiling, I join him in sleep.

Niran’s the first to wake when his phone sounds like it’s going to vibrate itself onto the floor. His hand snakes out to grab it.

Sleepily he answers, “Prez?”

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