Page 58 of Petty's Crime

I can’t let this go further. I have to shut this down fast. I slip back into the man I became once I was freed from Britney.

“You wanna quick fuck, darlin’?” I thrust my hips against her. “I’m down for that.” I raise an eyebrow in question. “One for the road, what do you say?”

Her eyes narrow as they meet mine, and while I try to ignore it, I fucking love the way her face is flushed and her lips swollen and that it’s down to me. I’d love to love her in the way she’d want to be loved, but a quick fuck is more in character. I have to step back before I fall any deeper.

“You’re still married,” she reminds me, her mouth twisting in disgust.

“I’m married,” I concur with a shrug, hoping to convey what I’m offering is a promise of nothing more than two consenting adults getting their rocks off. I know I’m safe and that she’d never accept such a proposition, though my cock jerks as if hoping I’m wrong.

Her fist hits my chest, but oh so gently as her eyes settle on my face, making me feel uncomfortable as if she can see right down to her soul. “I know what you’re doing, Petty. And you’re an ass.” But she says it without ire.

An asshole, yeah, I’ll own that. But that’s who I’ve got to be to protect myself and the life that I’ve built up. Without the Devils, I’d be nothing.

As RoseLyn goes to splash water on her face, I stand, body tight, finding it harder than usual to tamp down the softer side of me and find the man I truly am. I suspect it’s all RoseLyn’s fault that it’s harder than usual to become the façade I’ve so carefully cultivated.

When she returns, the yearning to kiss her once more almost blindsides me, making me even more determined to never let her see the Clark side of me again.

I can’t even allow myself to relax in front of her parents. But sharp as RoseLyn is, she explains my abruptness by telling them that I wasn’t looking forward to the flight ahead. They give me a few funny looks, but all in all, I think I get away with it. Especially when I force myself to put my arm around her when I lead her to the car. No, why lie to myself? I let myself enjoy that last permissible slip before I return to keeping my distance, and my hands firmly to myself.

It’s her who keeps the conversation going while her parents drive us to the airport. She hugs her parents goodbye, holding on tight for a few seconds. Rufus eyes me in an assessing way when he shakes my hand, but Martina ignores the standoffish vibes I’m putting off, and envelopes me in her arms and gives me a kiss on the cheek.

“Don’t be a stranger, you hear?” Martina tells me. “And you take care of my girl.”

I’m saved from having to answer as RoseLyn tugs at my arm. “We’ve got a flight to catch, Mom. I’ll give you a call when I’m home.”

And then we’re alone, and there’s no need for me to pretend anymore. Or to be correct, even more need than ever.

The flight is a reversal of yesterday’s, with RoseLyn obviously uneasy and scared. And I’m a bastard, as even though I know how nervous she is to fly, I can’t bring myself to hold her hand. Staring straight ahead, I ignore her.

I get her bag down for her and carry it off the plane. I’m a man, it’s expected. Then we traverse the terminal and exit to the parking lot.

It’s only when we’re at the SUV that RoseLyn places her hand on my arm. She waits for me to look at her, then allows me to see how earnest she is as she makes me a promise. “Your secret’s safe with me. I won’t let anyone know.”

She sounds so compassionate and forgiving, it makes me realise what a motherfucker I am, and how lucky I am to find a woman who seems to get me. She’s the one who’s got the right to be angry. As she continues to stare at me, I have to drop my eyes. Turning away, I grunt, and tersely reply, “Appreciate that.”

There’s no further attempt on either of our sides for any more conversation.

She’s taken aback when I head toward her home, but there’s no need for her to hide in a hotel now. She’s clearly reluctant when, after I’ve parked, I open the door and get out, taking her bag and carrying it for her, then waiting for her to put her in the front door.

She’s nervous as hell, clearly on the lookout for snakes that might have escaped. Her pale face and slight tremble shows she’s far from comfortable. But I ignore all that, and act oblivious even while I know some assurance about how my brothers will have cleared them out would be welcomed.

My desire,need, to put distance between us, is absolute.

Unable to say my conscience is clear, I leave her and head back to the clubhouse where I exchange the car for my bike, strapping my duffel onto the back. Then I walk inside.

I seem to enter in the midst of some kind of celebration. Men are laughing, raising glasses, and on seeing me, Roller lifts his hand in welcome.

I stand for a moment, letting the atmosphere sink in.This is the life. This is what I can’t give up.

Red gestures toward me and pauses his conversation with Crash. “You dropped RoseLyn at the hotel?”

I scrunch my eyes. “The hotel? I took her back to her house.” His expression worries me. “It is safe for her now, isn’t it?”

He sighs as if in exasperation. “Safe, yeah, but with the shock she’d had, I thought it would take her a moment to ease into the idea of going back. She’s so fuckin’ scared of snakes, Brother.”

“We cleared them all out.” I shrug.

“Yeah, but up here,” Red taps his forehead, “she might not accept that. You’re a cold-hearted bastard, aren’t you?”

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