Page 32 of Shattered Mind

“Mm-hmm. Is that why your lipstick is smudged?” I ask, pointing to the side of my lip to indicate where it’s smudged.

Savannah bursts into laughter and I follow suit until the three of us dissolve into a fit of giggles.

CHAPTER 15

GRAYSON

“So, Olivia, huh?” Killian asks with a smirk as he slides up next to me and my head snaps to him.

“What?” I feign nonchalance, tightening my grip on my beer bottle as I search for the woman in question amongst the people gathered in my parents’ backyard.

“According to my sister, you slept with Liv.” He raises a brow at me.

I take a long drink, biding my time before answering him. Sometimes, my brothers - Killian included - can be worse than women on the gossiping front, and if Kill knows; they all know.

As if he was summoned, Noah appears on my left. “How was she?” He asks, lifting his bottle to his lips in an attempt to hide his smile.

“I’m not talking about this with you two.” I grumble, keeping my expression neutral, my eyes facing forward. Once upon a time I may have indulged them. I’d have laughed and joked and clinked my bottle in cheers as I told them all about the events of the night before. But that was another life, and Liv isn’tjust a random woman that I picked up in a bar on a Saturday night and am never gonna see again.

“Oh come on, man. It’s been months since you got laid. We’re happy for you.” Noah teases, his voice laced with humour.

Not sure how the fuck he’d know when I last got laid, but it’s definitely been longer than months. I haven’t been able to stand the feeling of another person’s hands on me for years now. In the first few months that followed Ruebens death, I lost myself in women and whiskey. I spent seventy percent of my time in a bar a few towns over and the other thirty percent balls deep in whatever random chick I picked up there.

Eventually, the distraction stopped working, and Hunter caught on to my drinking habits and kicked my ass into gear.

I wouldn’t say I had a problem with alcohol. I didn’t depend on it, but it helped quiet the noise in my head. The voice inside of me that blamed me for the bad shit that happened to my best friend. The image of his lifeless body that played on repeat every time I closed my eyes.

Now, I limit myself. I throw my all into my work on the ranch and allow myself five drinks maximum. The only time I ever exceed that is on Rueben’s birthday and anniversary.

With less alcohol in my system, the regret and disgust washed in. I used and was used by countless women, thinking it would take my pain away, even just for a few hours. It didn’t work. The minute the door closed behind each one, I felt dirty.

Until Olivia.

When I walked out of her house, I felt freer than I’ve felt in over four years. And I fucking hate that.

“You’re thinking about it right now, aren’t you?” Noah asks, his eyes twinkling with a sick sense of pride.

“Fuck off, Noah.” I throw my now empty bottle into the trash can and walk away, his booming laugh following me.

This is why I like to avoid the fuckers. I attend our monthly family barbecues to save face, but other than that I prefer to make myself scarce. Today, however, is our mom’s birthday, so I have no other choice but to be here and put up with my brothers’ shit.

I storm through the back door of my parent’s house and find the exact woman I was looking for, bent over, delectable ass that I had a handful of not twenty-four hours ago in the air, as she roots through the fridge.

“Looking for something?” I ask, and Olivia lets out a screech as she whirls on me, clutching a bottle of what I’m learning is her favourite wine in her hand, ready to launch it at the intruder.

“Fucks sake, Gray. You nearly gave me a heart attack.” She places her weapon on the kitchen counter as she glares at me.

I let a rare chuckle escape me and I don’t miss the momentary surprise in her eyes. “Were you about to throw a glass bottle at me?”

She crosses her arms, eyes flicking to the side before landing back on me. “No. That’d be a waste of wine.”

I take a step towards her, cocking a brow. “Can’t have that, can we?”

Liv shakes her head and says nothing as she watches me approach her. “You know, I’ve been getting shit off my brothers about a little rumour they heard.”

“Hmm. You can thank your new sister-in-law for that.”

I place my hands on the counter either side of her, caging her in as I stare down into her sky-blue eyes. “And how does she know?”

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