Page 22 of Off The Ice

I looked over to the spot next to me, knowing this was probably hitting too close to home for Cassie. Sure enough, there were tears welling up in her eyes. I shifted awkwardly, not knowing what to do if she started crying again. I was sure that pulling her in for a hug would be overstepping, and I had never been one for physical contact with people, anyway. But for some reason, I had the most bizarre urge to reach for her and tell her it would be okay.

Of course, being sane, I didn’t.

“I thought Dave and I were Chandler and Monica, but we’re Ross and Rachel,” she said, starting to blubber. “And I hate Ross and Rachel.”

Lost, I scrambled for words of comfort. “You’re not Ross and Rachel,” I said, trying to follow her analogy. “You can be Monica or whoever it is you want. Dave’s just a dick. Not part of the equation.”

She wiped the tears away from her face. “Yeah.” She sniffed. “You’re right. I mean, I’m the same age as they are in season one. My wholeFriendsarc is just starting. I should thank Dave because he probably started my plot line for me.”

I nodded along in confusion, but hey, if it was making her feel better, I could go along with whatever code she was using. “Right. Exactly.”

“I should get to bed,” she said, standing up from the couch. “Don’t want to be tired for work tomorrow. I already missed a day.” She bit her lip guiltily.

“Okay,” I said, feeling a strange sense of regret at the loss of her presence. “Goodnight.”

She stood, gathering the blanket around her shoulders as she turned to go, granting me a smile more like sunshine thananything else I’d ever seen in my life. Then she left, leaving me there to linger in the darkness.

I rubbed a hand over my face. I must’ve been lonelier than I ever imagined. It was the only way to explain why I was so unbothered by her being here. I liked knowing that while she was sleeping in my house, she’d be comfortable and kept safely away from dickheads.

She might be upset right now, but I saw what she couldn’t. That the loss of that guy wasn’t a loss at all. Unless you counted the dead weight being lifted off her shoulders, I knew before long that guy would be a thing of the past. A blip in her rearview mirror.

I sat there in the darkness of the living room as the next episode started to play. To my surprise, I found myself snorting out a laugh at some of the corny jokes. Not the kind of humor that usually landed with me, but somehow, it didn’t seem so bad tonight.

It wasn’t going to be so bad having her here, either. I was just being a good guy, helping out my sister’s friend who’d had a rough time. I had the space. It’d be selfish not to share it, right? Anyone would want to help out a good person who had already been through enough. That’s all it was.

When I finally dragged myself to bed, I found sleep came easier than usual. I told myself it was just the satisfaction of knowing I’d done the right thing. Nothing more than that.

Chapter Nine

Cassie

Being back at work felt strangely liberating. It was like I had a part of my identity back when the rest of my world had abandoned me.

I might not have my apartment, my boyfriend, or my sanity, but I still had my job, and I was good at what I did. It didn’t hurt that it gave me something else to focus on. An idle mind lets the demons in and all that. At least, mine did.

In the last forty-eight hours, I’d let myself wallow, and I’d let myself cry. Now, I needed to get back into action and figure out my life. Things happened, plans changed, and people let you down. I’d always known that. How could I not, with the upbringing I’d had? But still, I’d been stupid. Six years in a relationship had lulled me into a false sense of security. For some silly reason, I thought it had meant something.

Still, I could treat it as a reminder.You can’t really count on anyone but yourself.That’s just the way it was. And thankfully, I still had me.

Not that I felt very much like myself as I walked into school wearing Maggie’s clothes. I’d been too much of a coward to grab any of my own after the fiasco of yesterday morning. Usually, I wore colors or florals or some type of pastel palette, but today, I was rocking Maggie’s fierce pencil skirt with a fitted black turtleneck. While she always looked stunning, I felt like I’d stepped out of a Tim Burton movie.

At least I had my coffee, courtesy of my new temporary roommate. I’d woken up at a normal time this morning, resigned to the fact that I’d have to lean on Liam’s generosity for a little while longer. After getting ready at a leisurely pace, I’d come downstairs to find that he was already gone.

On the counter, there’d been a note, written short and simply, letting me know he’d gone to the gym. Beside it sat a thermos filled with hot, intoxicating coffee. At first, it didn’t register. I thought for sure he’d made it for himself and forgotten it, but he didn’t seem the type to forgetanything.Besides, it smelled so good, and I was in dire need of caffeine. If he’d left it behind, why let it go to waste?

So, with Maggie’s clothes on my back and Liam’s coffee in my hand, I carried tokens from both of the Brynn siblings with me, like armor that might shield me from the cold, harsh world.

I had just gotten into the teachers’ room when I felt my phone buzz in my bag. Holding my coffee up in one hand, I used the other to dig through my belongings until I pulled the device out.

On the screen was a text notification from a number I hadn’t saved. I frowned down at the message that didn’t give any indication of who the sender might be.

UNKNOWN:Cassie?

The text came from another iPhone.

CASSIE:God?

UNKNOWN:What?

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